Ruined - A Screenplay

FADE IN:

Black screen. Faint interference. A blurred image comes into view.

EXT. Racton Folly - NIGHT

Racton Folly is an abandoned folly near Chichester. It has one circular tower and two rectangular towers either side. It’s a cold night.

DOMINIC: (voice over) It stands, a cankerous blot on the horizon; a syphilitic.and… phallic silhouette waiting for us to enter its rotting ruins… and like the condemned awaiting the journey to limbo I know I’m damned…

SERENA: Don’t you think you’re laying it on a bit too thick, Dominic?

DOMINIC: Fuck off, Serena - it’s my last chance to make an impression.

CUT TO:

Title Card: RUINED (in Roboto Mono typeface)

CUT TO:

EXT. RACTON FOLLY - NIGHT

Serena, Dominic, Ian and Chris are setting up for a night's filming. Ian is carrying a ladder behind Serena and Dominic who are walking to the ruins. Chris is a rather shapely woman and is holding the camera. Serena is wearing a black T-shirt with the words GHOSTINGS in spooky letterings.

SERENA: Oh, you’ve made an impression alright… as a complete and total fraud. You’ve ruined whatever reputation we had as serious paranormal researchers. So you're the one that can fuck off, Dominic.

DOMINIC: You’re never going to let me forget that, are you? So I faked some ‘evidence’. Who cares? We got better ratings, and I think that’s what you’re so sore about!

SERENA: Oh, just fuck off.

IAN: (Stumbling with the ladder) Guys, you do know this is still being filmed?

CHRIS: (walking backwards with  the camera)  Don’t stop… Don’t stop! This is great, if nothing else it’ll help boost the ratings on YouTube!

SERENA: (stops trying to bait Dominic and looks around) Look, I’m getting a really bad feeling about this place.

DOMINIC: Walk away if you want, and good riddance!Then the show will be mine… 

They’re at the base of Racton Folly and Ian finally divests himself of the ladder, up against one of the walls.

IAN: (Mutters to himself) Well, that wasn’t heavy at all. Thanks a fucking bunch, guys.

Ian sees Serena staring at Dominic with hate in her eyes and interjects before anything else can be said.

IAN: Are we going to start this or not?

Serena nods and motions to Chris to start focusing on Dominic properly, with the Folly in the background. Serena starts to count off 3-2-1 on her fingers but Dominic starts on two to spite her.

DOMINIC: Known more for its arcane significance and profane historical activities than its architectural prowess, Racton Folly has stood here for over 200 years and who knows how many more it might stand? In a departure from our normal mediumistic nocturnal activities; for this, our last foray into Ghostings history, we are going to spend the night in the ruins of the notorious…

SERENA: (Whispers to herself) Keep to the script, you fat fuck.

In the distance they can see the blue lights of a patrol car coming up the drive behind them. Serena motions to Ian who moves the ladder out of sight. 

DOMINIC: What…the fuck…do the police want?

IAN: (Whispering forcefully) Don't say a fucking word to them, Dominic.I don't want you mouthing off to them; I'm not sure whether we're even allowed to be here…

CHRIS: Brilliant -I wish you'd told me that before! I don't want to get in trouble with the law.

DOMINIC: Yeah, you're still getting over the last set of charges, aren't you?

The policeman walks up the remainder of the path whilst this interaction has been going on. The policenan has his torch out.

OFFICER PETE: (Motioning towards the camera) Is that thing off?

Serena nods.

OFFICER PETE: So what brings you out on a chilly night? Not the most glamorous of places to set a student film.

SERENA: Flattery will get you everywhere, Officer. My name's Serena; this is Chris, Ian and Dominic. We're filming our last ever episode of Ghostings -it's a paranormal research thing… y'know…

OFFICER PETE: Kinda like Ghost Watch then. 

Dominic is about to say something but Ian treads on his foot, hard.

OFFICER PETE It’s ok… I've actually heard of you. My wife loves all that kind of stuff… I don't suppose I have to ask what you're doing at Racton then… you're braver than me!

IAN: Is it ok for us to be here, Officer?

OFFICER PETE: I don't see why not…  (Scratches his head) I personally wouldn't as it's a well-known place for druggies…

Dominic has moved away from Ian and is about to say something else but he glances over at Serena, who has been watching him the whole time and stays quiet.

OFFICER PETE: Tell you what: I’ll just have a check around for you. It's better to be safe than sorry -there can be right little thugs around here…

Serena walks around the ruins with Officer Pete whilst Ian and Chris do their best to keep Dominic away from him. They’re unloading what little camera equipment they have. Officer Pete can be heard recounting bizarre tales to Serena.

OFFICER PETE: The one that had me personally spooked was one misty night and I was on my own… still a rookie and I was patrolling here and Kingley Vale. I couldn't see for nothing but heard lots of rustling… It was then that I heard a very loud cough and I've never jumped so high in my life.

SERENA: What was it?

OFFICER PETE: A bloody sheep.

SERENA: I didn't even know sheep could cough.

OFFICER PETE: Nor did I… but when I looked into the next field that's exactly what I saw… and one even looked at me with a guilty expression on his face.

The group walk around the ruins of the folly.

SERENA: Who’s blowing on my neck?

Everyone shrugs and Officer Pete ignores what Serena just said.

OFFICER PETE: Where did you park your car, anyway?

IAN: (who’s finished packing) Down the road, why?

OFFICER PETE: That's alright. There's less chance of it being nicked or vandalized there. Had you parked it nearer here than anything could've happened Well… it all seems ok. I'm not sure I'd want to do this but I can't actually stop you. Look… I'll pop round intermittently but here's my mobile number -I don't normally give this out, but I have a bad feeling about this. Just ring me when you leave, for my own peace of mind…Oh… be careful where you walk and what you pick up. This place is a druggies paradise, there'll be broken bottles and discarded needles... and who knows what else you're going to find.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:

EXT. RACTON FOLLY - NIGHT

The police officer has gone and the four crew have set things up. 

The inside of the folly is hollow. The folly is hollow. Three inaccessible floors rise above a basement thirty feet below. There is no way up or down except by ladder.The camera is on a tripod; Ian is trying to maneuver the ladder to the first floor, which is just a lip about four feet wide. Dominic is standing at the base, nicely lit from the newly installed floodlight.

DOMINIC: (Speaking to the camera) The origins of this tower are shrouded in mystery. And although Lord Hallifax built this as a banqueting hall and statement piece back in the late 1700s it's been the site of much worse activities, including a brief stint as a brothel in the mid 1800's.

CRASH

Ian has just misjudged the first floor and the ladder crashes to the floor.

DOMINIC: Oh, well done! Why don't you just let everyone know we're here, eh? We're supposed to be doing this on the QT. The last thing we need is a group of drugged-up psychopaths stumbling on us here!

IAN: Yeah -about that… As I was struggling here with the ladder… again (and cheers, by the way, for someone giving us a hand!) I saw a group of people standing at the roadside by our van…  I've no idea who they were and didn't really want to stop and find out.

DOMINIC: (Looking nervously in their direction) They're probably no one in particular.

Serena suddenly realises how isolated they are. She follows everyone's gaze. In the distance, three glowing cigarette tips. She looks around for something she can use as a weapon. A tree branch catches her eye.

DOMINIC: (Sarcastically) Somewhere you'd rather be?

SERENA: Trying to be sensible; just do what you do best and ignore me.

CUT TO:

EXT. RACTON FOLLY. NIGHT

They’ve managed to reach the first floor and first Serena climbs up it, then Ian. Serena is still clutching the branch for protection, which makes it more awkward. It’s a hard climb and the ledge is precarious and narrow. 

Behind Serena is the drop into the glass-filled cellar. To her left, the broken arch. To her right, only three feet of ledge before the wall ends.

Dominic seems reticent to climb up and keeps stopping, peering out down the path they walked up earlier. Chris urges him up. Serena shines her light on the basement below them; it’s a thirty foot drop and the floor is shining, glinting. There are broken bottle and sweet wrappers.

CHRIS: They’re coming up the bloody path towards us, and they sound drunk and lairy.

SERENA; For all we know they could be the druggies that the police told us about. Fuck. Chris, you'd best hide. You've got the camera. If anything bad happens get the police back here.

Chris sneaks off with the camera and hides in some bushes on the periphery. The group walks up closer and stands at the base of the folly. One of them shone a torch directly at them.

MALE ONE: There they are… just like he said.

DOMINIC: (actually relieved now) It's ok. I'll handle this.

Serena and Ian look at each other in bemusement and shock as Dominic starts back down the ladder slowly and precariously.

WOMAN ONE: Where are you going, fatso?

The second man stands on the base of the ladder and shakes it. Dominic blanches.

DOMINIC: C'mon; that's not nice… That's not what we decided." 

SERENA: (Mouthing to Ian) What the fuck?

MALE ONE: No idea what you're on about, Tubs.You're on our property and you're all going to pay.

DOMINIC; Do I look like I have money on me?

SECOND MAN: Then you're gonna get it… 

He nods to the man on the base of the ladder.

MALE ONE: FOUR!

WOMAN ONE: You mean timber!

The man shakes the ladder harder. The woman runs to the ladder and stands on the other side. She gives it an almighty push. Dominic never has a chance. His eyes just widened in horror as he and the ladder slams to the ground with a sickening thud.

SERENA: (Screams) Bastards

Serena finds and picks up a loose chunk of rock at her feet. She throws it at the lad holding the ladder as hard as she can. It hits him squarely on the shoulder. He cies out.

MALE TWO: You're for it now, bitch. You better learn to fly.

The ladder is propped up against the wall again. The man climbs it. He pulls out a knife from his pocket. He almost makes it to the top. Serena swings the tree branch she’s been clutching. The blow catches him directly underneath his chin. 

He is knocked off the ladder and falls to the basement below, the knife falling from his hands onto the rim in front of Serena. The three youths below scream out insults and scrabble around them to find things to throw. Rocks and broken glass are flung at Ian and Serena.

SERENA: Flatten yourself on the ground!

Serena and Ian get to their knees as carefully. They stretch out onto their stomachs. Serena's pocket vibrates… it is her mobile phone. Serena gets it out of her pocket and sees that it is a WhatsApp message from Chris. 

Serena checks her phone: 

CHRIS: "Get your belts off, I've got an idea!” 

Thirty seconds later there is a lot of noise coming from the bushes on the outskirts of the Folly. Dominic's bombastic voice reverberates around. Ian looks at Serena aghast. Serena shakes her head.

SERENA : Get ready.

One man and the woman walk out to investigate the noise leaving the other man to stand guard. Chris sneaks behind the remaining youth and smashes him over the head with a rock. Serena and Ian take off their belts and throw them to Chris. 

Chris stares at the person she just struck. It’s not a man but a young boy. It is Ian who brought her back to reality. 

IAN: They're coming back! 

Chris looks up as Ian drops the belts to her. Chris ties the three belts together. She loops them around the base of the ladder and runs the other end to a hiding place inside the folly. She then makes sure she’s safely out of sight. 

MALE ONE: (walking back to the ruins with the woman) It was the fucking camera! Someone else is out there somewhere.

IAN: (Shouting back) Yeah; and you're surrounded!Your mate's legged it… you're all alone now!

SERENA: Yeah; just fuck off before it's too late!

The man swears at them both and starts climbing up the ladder. Seeing her opportunity Chris yanks on the belts forcing the ladder to fall backwards and on top of the man. Chris grins and runs to secure the ladder so Serena and Ian can escape. She doesn't see the woman behind her.The woman slashes her throat with a knife.

Ian screams at the woman, all the time Chris is still clinging desperately to life. Serena can hear the wet gasps for breath; the sound mingling with sobs.  Serena screams in rage and shock, calling the girl every name she can think of which only angers the girl more. She looks around for something to throw. 

The woman throws two rocks; one after the other in rapid succession. Ian manages to duck the first but doesn’t see the second. Serena sees the momentary shock as it hits him on the temple hard, making him step back. He falls silently.  The woman drags the ladder and props it against the floor adjacent to the one Serena is standing on. 

The woman is being careful… but Serena can now finally get a good look at her attacker: a thin, bespectacled girl in smart clothes. The girl has started her climb up but before she reaches the top she throws something at Serena's legs, making her lose her balance. 

Serena almost falls off but manages to twist and fall hard onto her knees. She stops herself from toppling over but it's painful. Whilst kneeling on the ledge she sees the knife the other man dropped.

The girl is close to jumping the gap now. Serena sees the bloodied knife in her hands and stands up. The girl makes the jump effortlessly. There is so little room for them to maneuver. The girl runs at Serena, slashing the knife in wild arcs. Serena barely manages to avoid them. 

The girl rips a gash into Serena's side and tries to push her over. There is no time for Serena to think, just react. She manages to pivot out the way of the second thrust. At the same time she twists her body to avoid the knife, but she’s still too slow to miss it all. 

The knife plunges into the top of her arm. Serena uses that to her advantage and thrust her own knife into the girl's stomach and twists it. She doesn’t stop there; she just stabs; stabs hard and fast. Serena never sees the girl fall off the ledge… 

Eventually the reality of what happened dawns on her. It’s over but the ladder is still on the ledge opposite. She’s too badly injured to try and make the jump across and it’s too high up to try and drop down. She has become the latest witness to the Racton sacrifices. 

CUT TO:

EXT. SUSSEX WEALD. MORNING

The sun rising over the Sussex Weald with Racton Folly standing in silhouette.

SERENA: (Voice over) It stands, a cankerous blot on the horizon; a syphilitic.and I know that I am damned too. 

FADE OUT:

Tower Siege - An Original Screenplay

EXT. LONDON EAST END TOWER BLOCK - EARLY MORNING

The tower block is strangely quiet. It can be seen in all its squalid beauty; two towers of urban brutalism. Lights are on in various windows.  A ball of green flame envelopes the left hand tower with a brilliant flash. An unholy roar of triumph is heard and then everything goes back to normal, except there are no lights on in any of the windows and the street lights around the vicinity are out too.

CUT TO:

INT. HURT BROTHERS HEADQUARTERS - MORNING

The living room in the top floor of the right hand tower-block. The room is spacious, luxurious. In fact, it is two rooms knocked together. The HURT BROTHERS own both blocks and this floor is theirs. Their throne room. RONALD HURT is sitting on a large leather sofa, smoking a large cigar. Ronald is relaxed in every manner except for his eyes. 

REGINALD HURT is fencing with a dummy. Reginald is very good with the rapier blade, despite his ungainly look. They are both talking to Freddy and Johnny. In the corner stands Dom. He is their hardman. He is completely bald with a beard and tattoos on his arms. He also wears glasses, similar to granny specs.

Reginald is six foot, balding and wears thick glasses. Ronald has black, slicked back hair and carries a scar on his left cheek and the remnants of a broken nose.

REGINALD: Green flame, you say? 

RONALD: What the fuck were you smoking last night, Freddy?

Freddy looks at Reginald fencing and is unable to comprehend what is going on.

RONALD: Just ignore my brother’s fencing practice and fucking answer me.

FREDDY: I know you wouldn’t believe me, Ronnie. (to Johnny)I told you he wouldn’t fucking believe me.

Johnny shakes his head and takes a step back as Ronald gets up from the sofa and takes Freddy by the collar.

RONALD: Listen, you piece of shit. I don’t care who you used to be. You work for me now; for us. For the Y-Boys. You call me Ronald, right? Or Mr Fucking Hurt, and you have fucking respect… Else Dom will give you a visit.

Dom just stands in the corner and nods to Freddy.

FREDDY (gulps): Jeez, Mr Hurt. I meant nothing by it. I was just freaked out by last night. It really did happen! Never seen anything like it.

REGINALD: Well, I tell you what, Freddy. Mr Ascomb owes us some money; and he lives in Tower Block, right? So why don’t you and Johnny pay him a visit… and see if anythings changed… If there was a fire I want to know details, right? Details are important, right; Ronald?

RONALD: Right. Mr Ascomb lives on the 2nd floor, 21b, if memory serves.

Ronald and Reginald nod in unison. Ronald sits back down.

REGINALD: Off you go, the pair of you… 21b!

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 2ND FLOOR, OUTSIDE 21B - MORNING

Freddy and Johnny are standing outside the flat, fidgeting.

JOHNNY: You had to make him mad, didn’t you?

FREDDY: Just shut up.

Freddy knocks on the door. They suddenly realise how quiet everything is. The knocks sound very loud. Johnny knocks again. The door opens. It’s not Mr Ascomb who answers but a five foot tall being in a flowing gossamer gown of shimmering pinks and greens. The being has wings and pointed ears, with pointed boots as well. Johnny and Freddy just look at each other.

CUT TO:

INT. HURT BROTHERS HEADQUARTERS - MORNING

Freddy and Johnny are back talking to the Hurt Brothers. Reginald is standing by the window, looking at the block opposite. He is holding an ornate cane. It suits him. Freddy is looking sheepish, his gaze on the floor. Johnny is wide eyed and rubs them from time to time. He has developed a strange, nervous tic.

REGINALD: So you visited him, yeah? Mr Ascomb.

RONALD: 21b? And you got the money, right?

Neither Freddy nor Johnny answer. Johnny looks to Freddy who still stares downwards. 

REGINALD: (swinging the cane so it points at Freddy) For fucks sake! Did you or didn’t you?

Silence from Freddy and Johnny.

RONALD: Fuck’s sake. Dom - ‘ave a word, will you?

Dom walks over to Freddy and cracks his knuckles.

FREDDY: He’s a fairy… He’s a fucking fairy! We went to get the money and a fucking… f…f… fair answers the door!

Reginald and Ronald laugh hard. 

RONALD: You were scared off by a fag? 

REGINALD: By a poof? Are you fucking kidding me? This better be a joke or Dom is bugger you up something bad.

JOHNNY: No… you don’t understand. He wasn’t a fucking homo; Mr Hurt. He was… a fairy; a fucking… fairy tale thing…wings and all!

REGINALD: Right, I’ve heard enough. Dom, do them in. No one tries to make a mug out of us. Fairy stories; wings? Fucking hell. 

Dom takes another couple of steps but Freddy sidesteps him and stands directly in front of the Hurt Brothers. He turns away; lifts up his coat and there is a bright orange tail hanging from his coccyx. 

FREDDY: It’s real, Ronald. It’s all fucking real. We knocked on the door twice. This fucking fairy-fuck answered it, wings and fucking everything. Asked us what we wanted. Johnny tries to explain but the Fairy isn’t interested. I try to stab my finger at it. It didn’t like that at all, told me I was rude and I needed to learn a lesson. It touched me on the fucking nose and bang, the door shuts hard and I’ve got this fucking tail. Then we heard a fucking growl, like a bear.

JOHNNY: We didn’t think twice. We just ran…

RONALD: Well, I tell you what you’re going to do. You’re going to go back there. You’re going to be super-fucking polite and get us our fucking money. And Dom is going with you as well, just to keep an eye on you.

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 2ND FLOOR, OUTSIDE 21B - MORNING

Freddy, Johnny and Dom stand outside 21B. Dom towers over the other two. Johnny knocks on the door, Freddy whimpers. The door opens and the Fairy stands there.

FAIRY: Oh. It’s you again. Hopefully you’re going to have more manners this time.

JOHNNY (trying to talk posh): We’re… dreadfully sorry to barge in on you again. We’re so sorry we were rude before, but we wonder if you know where dear Mr Ascomb is?

FAIRY: I don’t know any Mr Ascomb. We’re all new here. Why do you want Mr Ascomb?

DOM: He owes us money.

FAIRY: Does he indeed? Well, even I can understand that. Maybe if you talk to Mr Uruk on the 7th floor, he may be able to help. 72c.

DOM: Thank you. Thank you very much.

Dom nudges Johnny and Freddy.

JOHNNY & FREDDY (bowing) Thank you… thank you, sir…

FREDDY: Please can you take away my tail, Sir? I’m sorry for what I did earlier…

FAIRY: Well… it does look good on you… but as you asked nicely…

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 7th FLOOR, OUTSIDE 72C - MORNING

Dom, Johnny and Freddy stand outside 72C. Freddy no longer has a tail and he looks visibly relieved. Dom knocks on the door. The door opens and an Ork opens, dwarfing Dom. The Ork has thick grey, green skin and bones showing on the ankle and knee joints. The Ork is wearing chain mail armour.

CUT TO:

INT. HURT BROTHERS HEADQUARTERS - MORNING

Freddy is now standing in front of Ronald and Reginald. He has a sack next to him on the floor. The sack is of a thick material, like brown leather. Freddy is standing alone and looks pale and bruised.

RONALD: You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. The fairy did that to you? I told you to be fucking polite! 

REGINALD: Never mind that, where’s Dom? What the fuck happened?

FREDDY: I had to leave Johnny there. Dom is in the sack… and I’ve been told to give you this.

Freddy hands Reginald a scroll as Ronald gets up from the sofa and unties the sack.

RONALD: Jesus fucking Christ!

The sack falls open and Dom’s remains are in the sack. He has been neatly eighthed.  

Reginald opens the scroll. It suddenly flies out of his hands and starts to shine. BOSS SCAR’S voice is heard. It’s a deep voice, meltingly calm but with an edge to it.

BOSS SCAR: The tower is now mine. As is your block. You owe me fidelity and you must pay me tribute. I am power. If you wish to parley with me then you will need to back it up with force; not with your puny henchmen but with your bravest warriors. If you can fight your way to the top of the Tower then we may… talk. If you refuse then everything you own, everything you are… will be mine. You have until the next full moon.

The scroll burns suddenly in Reginald's hands. He drops it.

REGINALD: Fuck!

Freddy looks shocked. Ronald just stares at the sack with Dom’s remains inside and then looks at Reginald.

RONALD: Son of a bitch… What the fuck is going on? 

REGINALD: It’s very simple, Ronald. I don’t give a fuck who or what this fucking thing is. It all boils down to one simple thing. This. is. War.

CUT TO:

INT. THE ARMORY - MORNING

In the basement of the tower block. Rows and rows of shelves filled with knives, guns, clubs, chains. The gang help themselves to as much as they can carry. 

REGINALD: Put those fucking bazookas away! I don’t want any property damage, right? No sawn-off shotguns; no sub-machine guns. Nothing like that.

RONALD: Remember, use the weapons that are going to extend your reach. 

REGINALD: But keep something for close quarters, right? A shiv; knuckle dusters…that kind of thing.

Reginald is still brandishing his cane.

RONALD: You’re seriously not taking that with you!

REGINALD: You do you, right? And I’ll do anyone that comes in close to me.

Meanwhile Fatty finds a whole pile of riot shields.

FATTY (shouts): What about these, Reginald?

REGINALD: Now that is fucking good thinking, Fatty.

RONALD: Are you off your fucking rocker? When are we going to need them?

REGINALD: This is going to be a siege, right? Who knows what we’re going to encounter, right? Better to have them and not need them.. And be fucked without them. Besides, it takes me back.

RONALD (sighs): Yeah… the Toxteth riots. The fuzz had a fucking heart attack when we came out with these beauties covering our arses… Where’d we get them from anyway?

REGINALD: From Dom…

RONALD: Dom… Yeah… You lot ready? It’s about time we set things right again. We’re doing this for Dom as well.

EVERYONE: FOR DOM!

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK TOP FLOOR -MORNING

Looking out through the top floor window down to the ground below. A line of twenty men walking from one block of flats to the other. Each person carrying baseball bats, crowbars, demolition hammers, machetes chains. A couple of thugs are carrying plastic bags filled with glass bottles with rags hanging out of them. Boss Scar is in shadow.

BOSS SCAR: Isn’t this nice? Our neighbors are paying us a visit. Instruct the Uruk brothers to lay on a suitable welcoming. Let the Hobs soften them up a little first though. I want to see what this lot is made of.

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 2ND FLOOR, OUTSIDE 21B - MORNING

Everyone is standing, massed outside the Fairy’s front door. Freddy knocks on the door again. Ronald and Reginald are in the middle of the group so they are well protected. The door opens.

FAIRY: Oh… It is you. I was warned but I didn’t think anyone would be that stupid.

Freddy takes the Fairy by the scruff of the neck and shoves a shiv to its throat.

FREDDY: I’ve had enough of your shit. You’re going to take us to the boss or I’m going to slit you.

FAIRY: Silly boy.

The fairy places a finger on Freddy’s hand. Freddy turns into a four foot long fox. Kenny swings a pick axe down and cuts the Fairy’s arm off; the cold steel, killing him instantly. 

FREDDY FOX: Well, that fucking cuts it for me too. So long, fuckers. I’m out of here!

The fox runs away down the corridor.

REGINALD: Come back here you bushy tailed, ginger fuck!

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 3rd FLOOR - Mid-MORNING

The geography of the flat shifts slowly from the third floor. Graffiti scrawled, piss-streaked walls and stairwells lead to rocks and rough hewn stone steps until they come to a large wooden door that just appears. No more stairs, just blackness above. Carved in the door is a rune: ᚦ which means Thurisaz & represents a sharp defensive barrier, resistance, and a warning of danger.

RONALD: Fuck this… axes? Chop the fucker down!

Just as the six axe-wielding thugs walk up to the door it opens. There is a huge cavern inside, immensely tall with various passages running off in many directions. There are still remnants of the old furnishings though. There are settee’s, televisions, cookers, beds, sideboards. Whole indoor rooms in a cavernous environment, with dripping walls, mosses and strange fungi; huge stalactites and stalagmites. 

RONALD: Right. Nothing's changed. This is still the same; we’re out for a pound of flesh. What’s ours is ours. I don’t give a shit for their internal decoration, I want this Boss Scar fucker. Kenny… Billy? Off you go, you're the advance party. 

Kenny and Billy walk onwards, keeping an eye on everything around them. Kenny has a large length of bike chain as a weapon; Billy a crowbar. They get more than halfway through and turn around. They’re about to signal that everything is all clear when arrows are shot from nowhere. The arrows pierce Kenny’s throat and left eye and some more strike Billy in the groin, left eye and heart. It’s all over very quickly.

CHARLEY: What the fuck was that?

REGINALD: That was a fucking sniper, my son. (To Ronald) I think we owe it to Dom to show these fuckers what happens during a Toxteth riot!

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 4th FLOOR - MID-MORNING

The thugs walk into the cavern now in classic siege formation. Three men in front with the riot shields held in front of them; in the next row one holds the shield above them and the other two create the sides with theirs; then the three rows behind them do the same. Behind them sneaks Freddy The Fox… They advance slowly inside the cavern and encounter no more resistance.

CHARLEY: What’s going on, Ronald? 

REGINALD: Shut your fucking mouth. It could kick off at…

Arrows start flying from every direction. Hundreds of them. The siege tactics work and the thugs are able to slowly advance further into the cavern. They reach the bodies of Kenny and Billy.

RONALD: Leave the bastards be. Take their weapons though, you may need them.

The thugs walk over their body and the weapons are taken. They continue walking, it feels like they’re walking up a hill. They get within sight of the next door and then something comes up from one of the holes in the ground. It grabs BOBBY and slices the tendon of EDDY as well. It’s too quick to really see, but it’s a GOBLIN. 

Another GOBLIN jumps from the ceiling and starts stabbing the shields with its knives. The Goblin is about five foot, grey-green skin; pointed nose, like a rat; smooth, ill-looking skin. Its eyes are yellow and its teeth sharp. One of the knives is serrated like the teeth of a saw; the other is a stabbing blade with a barb at the tip. Both are well used and blood stained, like the bodies of the Goblins. More Goblins join the fray, coming from all sides. The riot shields are holding, just but it leaves no room for the rest of the thugs. They either stay defensive or get swamped. The Goblins are all using strange sounds, a language of some kind. There are NO SUBTITLES. The Goblins attack in a frenzy with several trying to attack a single riot shield. This goes on for some time; 3 or 4 of the thugs are killed due to the sheer frenzy.

REGINALD: This is getting us nowhere! 

RONALD (shouting):  I’m thinking this is just like the fucking 1966 World Cup again… There’s no way I’m letting these little fuckers take the Tower from us. Are you with us?

REGINALD (Shouting): ZIGGER ZAGGER! ZIGGER ZAGGER!

THUGS (Shouting back): OI! OI! OI!

The Goblins look momentarily bemused by this. The Thugs all use their shields to suddenly push up and outwards. This dislodges the Goblins and they can now use their weapons. Those with the axes and steel pipes; hatchets and baseball bats are at more of an advantage. The baseball bats all have nails and spikes sticking out. The battle is fierce with many goblins taken out, but there are quite a few thugs killed as well. Sometimes the goblins become obsessed with the kill and keep stabbing / slashing at the body long after it's dead, but they easily killed themselves. 

Slowly the thugs get pushed back until they’re close to their original formation. But Fatty has the Molotov Cocktails and lights them. Fatty hands them to Ronald and Reginald. They lob them out of the circle of thugs. The Goblins scream at the fire and run. More cocktails are lobbed at them. There are only seven of the thugs left, with Reginald and Ronald looking at the bodies strewn about.

RONALD: We haven’t got time for this shit. Grab whatever weapons you can and the shields. The door’s in front and that’s where we’re heading.

The thugs come across another door with this rune burned in: ᚼ. This represents sudden, unpreventable destruction, catastrophic change, and a force of nature that cannot be reasoned with. Again, the door opens and there is another cavern, sloping upwards. 

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 8th FLOOR - LATE-MORNING

As the last thug walks through the door it closes, but not before Freddy the Fox slips in and hides behind a boulder. The thugs advance, still in the siege formation. There is a thick mist making it difficult to see through. They get halfway into the chamber and a 10 foot tall Ork, similar to the one from earlier, walks towards them through the mist.  

Fatty walks out with a molotov cocktail and throws it at the Ork. It smashes on the Ork’s body and it becomes awash with flame. The Ork walks closer, Fatty throws another one. The Ork laughs. The Ork lifts its huge mace and simply crashes it down on to Fatty with a sickening thud. Fatty’s legs just fold from underneath him and he falls down, dead. The Ork is still advancing.

REGINALD: Step aside fuckers.

Reginald takes his cane, and withdraws a sword from it in a poetic gesture. He then stabs the Ork in the throat, then in the heart. The Ork looks at him askew and falls down, dead. 

There is a large grunt / growl and several more Orks emerge from the mist, all with huge Maces. They attack in a brutal fashion. Reginald kills several with his sword. He uses his fencing practice to keep out from the cumbersome strikes and swings. He decapitates some and just kills more. But the others don’t fare that well. 

Ronald is able to hold his own. He uses a machete and a riot shield. Soon there is only Ronald and Reginald left. There is one Ork left. Reginald stabs the Ork in its heart but the Ork snaps the blade and holds the shaft, lifting it and Reginald high up in the air. It then lunges at Reginald and rips his throat out.

There is a cry from behind and Freddy The Fox jumps out from a rock onto the body of the Ork. Freddy, still being large for a fox, is able to do a lot of damage to the Ork. He’s able to bite chunks out its throat. The Ork is distracted by this.

RONALD: Oy! Fuck face! Have some!

Ronald uses his machete to decapitate the Ork with one swift blow. He turns round to look at all the bodies strewn about. He falls to his knees at his brother's body.

BOSS SCAR: (disembodied voice) Giving up? I thought we might have a talk.

RONALD: Yeah, and the rest.

BOSS SCAR: Right through the door then.

The mist lifts and right in front of Reginald’s body is a new door. No rune. It opens. Ronald picks up Reginald’s cane and then he and Freddy walk through the door.

CUT TO:

INT. TOWER BLOCK, 10th FLOOR - LATE-MORNING

The door closes behind them. Freddy is now a human again. The tenth floor was a penthouse at one time. There’s no glass in the windows and the window frames are all smashed. On the ground are skeletons and cadavers, some fresh; some old and decaying. There are also coins, diamonds, and large geodes of various crystals. The room is mostly in darkness. 

BOSS SCAR: You’re to be congratulated. Many of these unfortunates never made it past the first three levels. Only a dozen made it past the Orks. I’m impressed.

RONALD: Show yourself, you bastard. 

BOSS SCAR: Don’t be too impetuous. That one became tiresome too… and look what happened to him.

A large, scaled tail -the thickness of a body- snakes out of the darkness, spikes on its end. The tail points at one of the dead bodies without a head or neck. The body has bite marks on it.

FREDDY: Holy God, oh fuck, ohhhh fuck.

BOSS SCAR: You might as well call me your God; or your highness… but I am SCAR.

The huge head of a dark green dragon comes out of the shadows. The rest of its body slowly slumping out, wings folded either side. Its neck is short at the moment as it's looking directly at them. Its eyes are red and there is smoke starting to plume from either side of its mouth.

RONALD: So you thought you would just swan in and take over what you wanted and fuck the opposition?

SCAR: What opposition? 

RONALD: You’re the one who needs to think about respect. You can’t come in here and just do as you please. 

SCAR: And why not? Who’s to stop me? What happened to your army?

RONALD: I don’t need no fucking army. I’m Ronald Hurt. Reginald was my brother. We started from nothing and I’m not going to let some piss-ant little tadpole tell me who’s the king of the fucking castle.

Scar laughs. It’s a booming laugh. It’s the first time he’s laughed like this in centuries.

SCAR: I like you, human! No one has ever had the balls to talk to me like that before. Oh, they’ve been arrogant enough, but you? I like you, Ronald Hurt. I think we could cut a deal!

FADE OUT:

The Immersive Escape - A Screenplay

FADE IN:

A cheesy PowerPoint presentation, complete with corporate transitions between slides. The slides are of various rooms that the characters are going to encounter and stock footage of happy people in brightly coloured escape rooms.. There is also a very officious voice over intercut with footage of the characters making their way into the escape room / office:

POWER-POINT PRESENTATION

DIANNE BOLUS: Hello. Here at CSC we believe that Escape Rooms are more than fright or flight. They can be a tool for pushing boundaries and understanding limits.

CUT TO:

INT. OFFICE RECEPTION - MORNING

In flashback: Nine people wait in the lobby: five women and four men. When a final woman dashes through the front doors of the reception they all enter the lift together. The doors take a while to shut.

CUT TO:

POWER-POINT PRESENTATION

DIANNE BOLUS: Through cognitive mastery we can push people beyond what they thought possible. Through controlled stress we can understand people's breaking points and identify their vulnerabilities through social cohesion and erosion techniques. 

CUT TO:

INT. LIFT - MORNING

Nine people are crammed inside the lift: EMMA, showing signs of claustrophobia; NATALIE, an overweight middle-manager; PHIL, chubby and obsequious; DEBBIE, quiet and tall, observant; FIONA, short, hair and wearing glasses; PAUL, wears a ponytail and still thinks it's cool to do so; NINA has curly hair and a buoyant personality; JEFF who wears glasses and keeps his opinions to himself and then there is STEVE.

The lift stops in a jarring manner and stays in one place for twenty seconds before the door finally opens. Emma looks relieved to be out of the lift and Phil genuflects as she exits. Debbie tells him to get out the fucking lift.

CUT TO:

POWER-POINT PRESENTATION

DIANNE BOLUS: There are seven rooms to escape from. The data taken from today's exercise will help when we push this out to the corporate world. Imagine: the office as an escape room with team building the ultimate game. 

CUT TO:

INT. 4TH FLOOR OFFICE - MORNING

The office is barely 30 feet by 30; the walls a dysentery brown with a pink frieze running in the middle; the CSC Logo stamped time and time again like a crude strip cartoon. The lifts are behind the group. As soon as the last person leaves it (STEVE) the lift doors suddenly close, leaving no trace of their existence. The room is entirely empty except for a table.

Everyone walks around it. There is a simple door bell randomly stuck on it. A single post-it note is affixed underneath with the words: “PrEss Me!” in erratic handwriting, scrawled using a blue biro that looked as if it was close to running out. Steve presses the button. The room goes black and the PowerPoint presentation is switched on, projected on to the far wall.

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: The immersive escape

INT. 4TH FLOOR OFFICE - MORNING

Everyone is watching the PowerPoint presentation still.

DIANNE BOLUS: This is the Orientation room and you have eight hours to reach the end point. The time starts when this message finishes. Good luck!

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: 1 - ORIENTATION

The message stops and the lights strobe for 10 seconds before flaring phosphorous white. When the lights dim back to normal the workers can see four doors; one in each corner of the room. 

STEVE: Maybe we should split up?

PAUL: That’s a crap idea. You’ve obviously never seen any horror movies.

STEVE: Of course, I have.

Paul prods Steve in the shoulder.

PAUL: Well, maybe you should try all of the doors in turn. If you don’t come back from one then obviously that’s not the one to take.

DEBBIE: You first.

Phil whirls around to confront Debbie but Natalie interrupts him.

NATALIE: We all need to do this systematically. Take each door in turn and follow where it takes us.

JEFF: And if it takes us to a trap-room then what?

FIONA: What’s a trap room?

PAUL: Ah, come on. There aren’t any trap rooms. (Points to the far right door.) Let’s just pick that door over there.

Everyone walks over to the right hand corner of the office and through the door.  The corridor is totally black in front of them. There is still light behind them but as everyone walks further on that light is turned off. The door shuts behind them.

PHIL: Fucking brilliant. 

PAUL: Don’t say a word, Jeff. We just need to feel our way out, there has to be a way out.

It takes them a while but they find themselves back in the same room again. They all look at each other.

                                                                                                                                                CUT TO:

INT. 4TH FLOOR 2nd OFFICE - MORNING

Jeff looks back to the corridor but there is no door, just a blank wall. Jeff shrugs and walks to the door opposite and stops.

JEFF: You do realise that we have no real way of knowing whether this IS the same room… I mean, you could  all wait for me to walk round again but what if I don’t… What if the door closes behind me and this WAS the right way out. We have to keep together. We have to try another door!

Everyone follows Jeff through another door. Again the door closes behind them and they fumble their way to the end of the tunnel. They end up in an exact replica of the room before. This time the lights are dimmer.

CUT TO:

INT. 4TH FLOOR 3RD OFFICE - MORNING

The door closes once more behind them and they choose the third door… With the same results. The fourth door leads to the same conclusion; a room so familiar, slightly dimmer bulbs but with a dampness in the air.

CUT TO:

INT. 4TH FLOOR 4TH OFFICE - MORNING

Everyone looks around to see what is going on. NINA notices there is something wrong.

NINA: Has anyone seen Steve?

The rest look around with no luck.

EMMA: It’s not as if he could be hiding anywhere.

DEBBIE: Maybe we lost him in one of the corridors.

FIONA: Yeah, but which one? I mean when was the last time any of us did a head count?

PHIL: (Tersely) A head count? What is this, primary school?

PAUL: Well, this was all about Orientation. I guess that Steve failed that exercise. Maybe we pick him up at the end.

DEBBIE: Has anyone else noticed the door over there?

At the far end of the office, where the lift was in the previous room, is another door.  The eight people run over to it and try the handle. The door opens but there is just another wall behind.

PAUL: What the fuck? This is crazy!

NATALIE: This is an escape room, did you really expect it to be easy? What we need to do is stop making assumptions and search. There is a way out of here, but it's not going to be obvious.

They search every wall for clues, even Paul. Fiona is more pragmatic. She searches the door and then the table.

EMMA: What have you found, Fiona?

FIONA: Look - on the door. Doesn’t that look like a place for a handle to go… There’s a hole with four smaller drill holes around it… and look on the table! There’s now a screwdriver there…

NINA: Wow! Check out Fiona! That’s a great feat of observation. I would never have worked that out!

NATALIE: Give it a try then, Fi. 

Fiona looks at Jeff and winces. Fiona picks up the slightly rusted screwdriver and tries undoing the screws on the door handle. The screwdriver slips a couple of times and nicks her hand, drawing blood. 

Phil snatches it from her, takes the door handle off and places it over the newly found holes. He then screws it into place. It fits. The group cheers, some genuinely but others, like Paul and Natalie just make a sarcastic WHOOP WHOOP gesture. The door opens to another corridor and leads down a slope to yet another room.

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: 2 - Collaboration

INT. 3RD FLOOR OFFICE - MORNING

This office is exactly the same as the preceding, albeit with dimmer lights and a slightly mankier tone.

FIONA: (sucking her finger where it bled) So how did that actually work?

JEFF: It's a double-acting, double-hinged door.

EMMA: (laughs, good-natured) Oh, is that what it is?

PHIL: Like you know what he’s talking about!

DEBBIE: Shut the fuck up, Phil!

JEFF: (undeterred) Basically, it divides the space immediately behind the door with a wedge-shaped partition. When the door swings one way, it blocks the other. Fascinating stuff… 

Nina: (whispers to Natalie) Not the only thing that swings both ways…

JEFF: (to Fiona, ignoring Nina completely) Is your finger alright?

FIONA: It tingles a bit, but it’s ok.

PAUL: Has anyone else noticed we’re in almost exactly the same room as before? As all the rooms before?

PHIL: It’s either cutting corners or it's down to an absolute lack of imagination.

The room looks more dishevelled than the last. The lights are gloomier with a bluish tinge. There is more of a musty smell and the walls had a reddish tinge to them. The floor is dusty and there are distinct footprints in the dust. Again, there were no doors and no discernible way of getting out. 

NATALIE: Split up, search the walls.

Everyone takes a systematic approach to searching. Running their hands along the walls, being careful to mind the mould spores. After a couple of minutes, a distinct click is heard. A narrow vertical gap appears in the opposite wall. Everyone runs over to the gap and as they do so it disappears completely.

PHIL: Bloody strange. It's more of a tease than you, Debbie! 

DEBBIE: Fuck off, Phil.

Debbie takes a step back. A click is heard again and the door opens another inch.  They all shout at Debbie:

EVERYONE: Don’t move!

EMMA: It’s pressure sensitive….

Emma looks down to where Debbie is standing

EMMA: Look! She’s standing right where those footsteps end!

Everyone sees the footsteps. Jeff spots another set of footprints further off and stands on the last pair. The door opens further. A light beckons from beyond.Natalie runs for the doorway. The door pivots against her weight and Natalie falls forward and down. There is only a void beneath her, like a lift shaft. She disappears into the darkness. A beat later, we hear the muffled thud. Debbie is about to move from her spot in panic.

JEFF: Don’t move! Whatever you do, don’t move. This might be our only chance!

Jeff tells the others to find the other set of footprints. Paul stands on one set and Emma on the last. The door opens fully. Phil stands on the edge of the new doorway and is unnerved.

PHIL: Somehow there’s a floor now.  It looks like it’s folded down from the ceiling when all the pressure plates were occupied.

He tentatively puts his weight into the new corridor and it holds.

PHIL: I’m alright now, not sure what you guys are going to do!

DEBBIE: It would be worth stepping off this just to see you fall, Phil!

JEFF: This isn’t helping at all, guys! If the rest of you step into the corridor and make  your way down it then the rest of us can try to make a run for it.

PHIL: That is something I’d pay money to see!

NINA: Fuck off, Phil!

JEFF: If I’m right then whoever is standing in the last position will act as a stabilising factor for the rest to run. We can then hold the doors for Emma to dash across.

Emma looks very nervous.

EMMA: Why me?

JEFF: I’m sorry, sweetie. It’s because you were the last one.

PHIL: And what if you’re wrong?

PAUL: What the fuck do you care? You’re safe anyway.

PHIL: Good point… get your running shoes on, Emma. I’ve got the popcorn ready.

EMMA; Shut the fuck up!

Fiona and Nina exchange a look. Phil, Fiona and Nina carefully step into the corridor.

JEFF: (to Paul and Debbie) Ready? 3…2…1… Run!

The three of them run to the door and make it without a fuss. They’re out of breath but all eyes are now on Emma. They all back away, halfway down the corridor. Jeff looks at Emma.

JEFF: It’s now or never, kid. We’ll do our best to hold back the doors. I won’t leave you!

Emma nods. She dashes for the doorway and makes it with no problems at all. The doorway stays open. Emma is out of breath and standing just inside the corridor smiling.

CUT TO:

INT. CORRIDOR - MORNING

Emma takes another step. The floor gives way beneath her and she falls before springing back up like a trapdoor. The corridor starts to close in around them, forcing everyone to the bottom doorway.Debbie is near the end of the corridor.

DEBBIE: Watch out!

The door is sliding shut. The six remaining barely make it in time to the new room.

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: 3 - ASSESSMENT

INT. 3RD FLOOR OFFICE - MORNING

The same room design as before. But like a demented, colour blind designer it’s darker with a cloying denseness. 

Fiona is now scratching her hand. Jeff takes hold of it to look at it. The hand is inflamed and an angry red. Fiona shrugs it off, tearfully.

The remaining six stare around the room. They see the table in the middle of the room as before. Now there are 6 square boxes, each with wires coming out the bottom leading somewhere. 

They walk round the table and scrutinise each of the boxes. All are fixed firmly and finished in a mahogany effect. On top of each are two fist sized holes.

Jeff doesn’t even hesitate. He thrusts his hands into the holes and everyone just stares at him.

JEFF: Nothing to report yet… wait a minute… There’s a slight tingling; more of an itch. If this is as bad as it gets then…

Phil shrugs and plunges his hands into the holes, as does Debbie. But there’s something different happening.

DEBBIE: Are your hands hurting at all?

PHIL: Mine are uncomfortable; like a sprain or an ache; but not hurting.

Jeff shakes his head, concerned over Debbie’s hands. He can see a logical progression.

JEFF: Mine’s more like pins and needles; but I can see where this is going. It’s going to get more unpleasant the further it goes on, but I get the horrible feeling no door is going to open unless all of us get… stuck in.

Paul and Nina quickly put their hands in the holes. The pain intensifies. It’s just Fiona that is left. She’s looking at the hand where her injury is. It’s obvious that it’s been troubling her more than she’s been letting on.

PAUL: For fucks sake! HURRY UP! I don’t know how much more I can take!

NINA: (Tries to take her hands out) We’re trapped! I can’t take any more, it’s too painful. Hurry up, you bitch! None of us can leave until you finish it.

FIONA: I can’t!! I can’t!

Everyone is shouting at Fiona to stick her hands in the holes until she finally breaks down. Screaming, she thrusts her hands in the box.

Immediately a door opens behind everyone and they are released from the boxes. There are no wounds anywhere on their hands. Phil launches himself at Fiona but Jeff shoves him back.

PHIL: (To Fiona) I’ll get you for this. (To Jeff) You do that again and I’ll end you too.

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: 4 - PERFORMANCE REVIEW

INT. 3RD FLOOR 2ND OFFICE - MORNING

There is no connecting corridor, just an identically imperfect room. The same soul-numbing decor, the same depressing mildew stink, just more pungent. Viscous liquid streaks the wallpaper, like residue from a smoking room after a heavy session.

Fiona stares at her hands and then at Jeff. Jeff shrugs after looking at it again. The wound is definitely infected and the veins in her arms are starting to turn black. 

Debbie looks around. No doorway again, even the one behind them had shut tight. The floor was cleaner this time; so no clues to be found there either. The upper walls are out of reach and no one really wants to touch the walls just in case they find out what is dripping down them.

Nina: I wonder what’s going on?

PAUL: What does it matter?

PHIL: We’re being picked off one by one. That’s what’s fucking going on.

DEBBIE: But why? It doesn’t make sense.

JEFF: What’s the context?

PAUL: Context? Who gives a fuck! I’m going to knock your fucking block off in a minute.

DEBBIE: Try it and you’ll have the rest of us to deal with.

PAUL: If you weren’t a woman…

FIONA: (weakly) And if you were more of a man, Paul, we might not be in this position.

JEFF: Look, this really isn’t helping. I heard rumors, right? There might be more to this… The boss lady, DIANNE BOLUS herself, big chief CEO supposedly had a breakdown not so long ago, right? She went away for a while to… find herself? She came back and then formed this new wing of CSC….

DEBBIE: Yeah. I heard something about that. There’s been rumours of a secret development for ages but it’s been very hush-hush. Then all of a sudden I get a letter saying I’ve been promoted to this new position to test this new vision of hers.

JEFF: But what if there was no finding of self? What if she had an L. Ron Hubbard moment on the road to Damascus?

PHIL: El Ray who?

JEFF: You need to read a book once in a while. Ones without pop-up centrefolds.

PHIL: You pretentious, jumped up arsehole. I’m going to crucify you in front of your bloody harem.

Phil lunges at Jeff but then something stops him in his tracks, something that no one else can see. 

PHIL: Well strike a fucking light… it’s just opened!

Everyone turns to see another door opening and this time Phil leads the way, but not without barging past Jeff as hard as he can.

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: 5 - LEADERSHIP

INT. 2ND FLOOR OFFICE - MORNING

The door shuts right behind the last person. All the lights suddenly go out. Nina screams whilst Fiona moans in despondency. 

PAUL AND PHIL: (almost in unison) For fucks sake, what now?!

A hissing noise, as if a tannoy has been turned on. Various snippets of dialogue can be heard.

JEFF: (Slightly mechanical) There’s only going to be one way out of here… Only the strong can get out of here.

JEFF: (more emotive)That wasn’t me speaking! 

Other voices are heard: 

VOICE 1: The cut on your hand is God's way of punishing you, Fiona…. You should have been looking out for Steve.

VOICE 2: (To Nina) Paul and Phil are going to kill you if they can… You know that to be true… you have to get to them first…

VOICE 3: Phil knows… Everyone knows about you, Paul. Don’t try to hide it any longer, You think that by acting tough you can…

Voice 4: You’re not half the manager Nat was, Debbie. You’re not half the woman Nat was either. Too many people have died here… The reason you’re still single is that you’re far too masculine!

All of the voices merge into a cacophony; swirling around their heads. It is Phil who cries out first:

PHIL: Fuck no! Fuck NO! FUCK NO!

The lights suddenly come back on. Phil turns to Jeff and, again, lunges for him. Jeff is ready. Phil takes a swing at Jeff. Jeff sidesteps and slams an elbow to the side of his head, hitting him hard. Phil falls hard. 

Silence.

Paul takes a step forward but Debbie has knelt down to take Phil’s pulse.

DEBBIE: He’s dead…Phil’s dead! 

A new door opens behind them.

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: 6 - SUBJUGATION

INT. 2ND FLOOR OFFICE - MORNING

Everyone stares at Phil’s prone body. Jeff looks numbed by it. Fiona is crying. Paul looks murderously at Jeff. Debbie walks over to Jeff and puts her hand on his shoulder.

DEBBIE: He attacked you. It’s not your fault. 

PAUL: Like fuck! He didn’t have to hit Phil like that! You could have tripped him, kicked him in the fucking nuts…

NINA: And what would you have done in the meantime?You were getting ready to knock the shit out of him as well…

PAUL: Yeah, and I’m still going to!

Paul leaps at Jeff. Jeff doesn’t put up any defense. He is still in shock. Paul puts his hands around Jeff’s throat and drags him through the open door.

Debbie and Nina try to stop him.

CUT TO:

INT. STAIRWELL - MORNING

The stairwell is cavernous, cold. Metal railings line the edge of the stairs leading to a long drop. Only the red glow of emergency lights illuminates the surroundings.

Paul tries to push Jeff over the metal banister but can’t. Nina and Debbie impede his every move. Paul slaps Nina away. This snaps Jeff back into the moment. 

Jeff stamps hard on the front of Paul's ankle and scrapes his foot down, forcing him to let go. Paul shouts in pain and throws off Debbie and Nina easily before lunging at Jeff again.

Jeff sidesteps in such a way that he trips Paul and Paul’s momentum carries him over the metal railing down the central stairwell, smashing against the stairs. His ragdoll body falls several storeys below them.

Jeff looks at Debbie and Nina.

JEFF: Thank you. (Turns to Fiona) Fiona? Are you ok?

Fiona is leaning against the closed door behind them, smiling weakly. Blood dribbles out of her nose. Her legs suddenly give way and she slides down the wall as if her strings have been cut. It is just Jeff, Debbie and Nina now. 

CUT TO:

TITLE CARD: 7 - OFFBOARDING

INT. STAIRWELL - MORNING

Jeff, Debbie and Nina continue to walk slowly down the stairs. The dark crimson emergency lights are disorientating, and a drip-drip -dripping noise seems to come from everywhere.. Debbie takes hold of Jeff’s hand and Nina follows suit. Foul looking water cascades down the central stairwell like someone wringing out a sponge. The PA system sparks on again.

DIANNE BOLUS: I knew you three would be the last. You’re almost at the end now and soon you will have the revelation that was given to me; and you will finally understand…

The floor becomes sticky underneath. With every step the inevitability grows; a crushing sense of déjà vu that only true horror can bring about. 

CUT TO:

INT. BASEMENT - MORNING

They finally reach the bottom of the stairs. There is Paul’s body, limp and as lifeless with one arm stuck out like a drunken signpost. Jeff follows its direction and sees one lone light shining in the distance.

NINA: (hopeful) Is that the way out?

DEBBIE: I don’t think we’re going to be that lucky.

They walk closer and the familiar dripping noise gets more pronounced. Nina tries turning back but Debbie and Jeff urge her on. 

They reach a pool of liquid, a viscous, crimson dew-pond. Kneeling at the far edge, staring at them, is a woman.

This is DIANNE BOLUS, Chief Executive Officer of CSC. She is dressed in a ‘power-suit’; double-breasted with shoulder-pads and a cream blouse and tight long skirt. She has her hands cupped in the liquid, drinking from the pool like it was a natural spring. Her face is beatific and horrific at the same time. 

She looks at Debbie, Nina and Jeff and smiles in recognition. 

DIANNE BOLUS: My children... my children returned to me… drink! Drink!

Behind her, six shapes slowly manifest from the darkness; six silhouettes. Nina sobs as she recognises them. Then she walks into the liquid and kneels as if being baptised. 

Jeff can only look at it happening. He struggles to move but finds that he can’t. Debbie is still gripping his hand, hard. Diane leans down to kiss Nina.

Jeff groans in helplessness, wanting so much to turn away but can’t. Debbie lets her hand fall from his. She walks over to Dianne, through the crimson pool and embraces Diane with a perverse passion. 

Nina rises out of the pool. Nina stands with Debbie behind Dianne as the rest of her brood walk out fully into the light. 

Emma, Natalie, Phil, Paul, Fiona and Steve all stand now behind Dianne.

JEFF: Take me then. Take ME! I’m yours.

Dianne shakes her head slowly and smiles. 

FADE OUT:

Dennis & Maude went camping - A screenplay

INT. MAUDE'S HOUSE - MID-MORNING

Maude lives in a kitsch cottage. It has all the trappings of a cottage from the 1950’s but with a strange modern vibe. There are paintings of the Virgin Mary in every room. In the lounge there is almost a shrine to her. The sofas all have plastic covers on them and everything is pristine. Maude is dressed in muted pastels. Her cardigan is the same pale blue of the Virgin’s robes. Maude’s clothes are well starched; barely any flesh showing, even her sleeves are longer than normal so only the finger tips show. She wears a long, tight skirt of a formal brown with sensible shoes. She looks attractive but fragile.

She is packing a suitcase. Everything has been meticulously folded and fitted into the suitcase perfectly. She is slow and fastidious. There is another bag full of cleaning bottles and scrubbing brushes; pairs and pairs of rubber gloves; surgical gloves and a large roll of black plastic bags. Maude packs a few more items and looks at her watch. She packs a few more then looks at her clock. 

MAUDE: Have I done the right thing? I don’t know. Is it too late to back out? 

CUT TO:

INT. OFFICE MEETING ROOM - AFTERNOON

CAPTION: TWO DAYS BEFORE

There is a meeting dragging on. Everyone’s face is showing signs of despair and boredom. Maude is diligently awake, but she is annoyed. Dennis is staring at Maude.

The meeting finishes. Bob, the manager, looks at his watch.

BOB: Think I’ve bored you enough. It’s time for a break, and as it’s home time we can sod off to the pub. My shout, everyone!

DENNIS (To Maude): Most sensible thing he’s said all day.

Maude looks at him with surprise, as it's the first time she’s seen Dennis and he’s an alien.

MAUDE (unsure of herself): Show me the way to the pub?

CUT TO:

INT. PUB - MID AFTERNOON

Maude is being talked at. She looks uncomfortable but tries to smile.

DENNIS: So I took a drink when they did. But whilst they were drinking beer I was knocking back whisky! Anyway, I went to the loo; fell asleep! Woke up about two in the morning and the coach had gone!

MAUDE (gasp): What did you do?

DENNIS: Cadged a ride in a taxi with one of the managers who was having it off with one of their temps! The ride was awkward but I got home alright.

Maude rubs her wrist just above the hemline of her cardigan. She then takes a drink from her orange juice, but she presses the glass to her top lip, then bottom lip before drinking. Dennis watches intently. Maude looks up and blushes.

MAUDE (sternly): I don’t like being stared at. Why are you staring at me?

DENNIS: I thought I was the only one that did things like that…

MAUDE: Like what?

DENNIS: What you did with the glass. It’s OCD… Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

MAUDE: There’s nothing wrong with me! I’m not obsessive; I don’t have a disorder and I definitely am NOT compulsive!

DENNIS: Look, it’s alright. I’m just the same. I drive my family to distraction with my OCD. I understand, it’s alright.

Maude looks at Dennis, looks at her sleeve. She smiles weakly.

CUT TO:

INT. MAUDE'S COTTAGE - MID MORNING

MAUDE: Maybe it will be alright. I just wish he would be on time!

CUT TO:

INT. DENNIS’S HOUSE - MID-MORNING

Dennis is standing in front of his full length, ornate mirror. There are three mirrors in his bedroom. One on each wall. On the double bed are various changes of clothes. Several different combinations of trousers, jeans, chinos and slacks. Lots of shirts of different colors and styles. Dennis constantly holds different shirts to different trouser combinations in the mirror and can not make up his mind. There is a large toiletries bag on the bed, next to a large suitcase. Inside the toiletries bag are lots of bottles of conditioner, skin creams, hair gel, moisturizer.

Dennis looks at the clock. He looks at his watch and curses. He carefully packs his clothes into his suitcase. It won’t close. He opens it again and unpacks the shirts and trousers. 

DENNIS: Four days… How do I know I’ve packed enough? Do I pack a back-up suitcase, just in case? Is Maude really going to appreciate what I bring to the table?

CUT TO:

INT. PUB - MID AFTERNOON 

FLASHBACK

Dennis and Maude, sitting in the pub.

MAUDE: You’re quite funny.

DENNIS: Faint praise, indeed.

MAUDE: Don’t be unkind. I don’t know whether I like you or not, yet.

DENNIS: I’ve got some chance, then. (winks)

MAUDE: I don’t know what you mean.

DENNIS (laughs): You can’t get out much then.

MAUDE: I don’t… At all… Do you?

DENNIS: Not really… I talk a good game, but I don’t like going out much… Not really.

MAUDE: We’re a pair. 

Maude takes a drink from her orange juice and looks at Dennis. She looks down at her glass again.

MAUDE: Dennis. I want to ask you something. I can’t quite believe I’m going to ask you this. But I’m very serious. And I want you to think about it.

Dennis looks at Maude and tries not to get himself excited.

MAUDE: I have bought a camper van. I want to test it out but I’m nervous to drive it on my own. 

DENNIS: How did you manage to get a camper van? Aren’t they fucking expensive?

MAUDE: Please don’t swear in front of me. I came into some money recently.

Dennis smiles at this.

MAUDE: My parents died in a car crash.

Dennis immediately frowns.

DENNIS: Oh. I’m sorry to hear that.

MAUDE: I’m not. They didn’t understand me. They thought I was a fastidious freak… Anyway. I have this camper van now. And I would like you to travel with me.

CUT TO:

INT. DENNIS'S BEDROOM - MID MORNING

Dennis closes the suitcase and takes one more look in the mirror.

DENNIS: Get in there, my son.

CUT TO:

INT. MAUDE'S CAMPERVAN - AFTERNOON

Maude is driving the campervan. Her seat is pressed very close to the steering wheel so she is not level with Dennis’s seat, which is more relaxed. Both seats have plastic covers and Dennis has a hard time from slipping off them. Dennis reaches to turn on the radio.

MAUDE: Please don’t touch that.

DENNIS: Don’t you want the radio on?

MAUDE: No. I don’t. But I also don’t think you’ve washed your hands. I don’t want you to touch things until you’ve washed your hands. 

DENNIS: I’ve touched the door handle and the seat though.

MAUDE: I know about those places. I can wipe them down. If you want to touch other places then there are wet-wipes in the glove department.

Dennis opens the glove compartment. There are four packets of large wet wipes. He takes one out and wipes his hands. There’s also a car safety hammer.

MAUDE: Now wipe the glove compartment handle and the radio switch.

Dennis does so and looks around.

DENNIS: Where shall I throw the used wet wipes?

MAUDE: Wet wipes? More than one? (sigh) You’ll have to put them in your pocket.

DENNIS: Don’t you have a bin or something?

MAUDE: Yes. But they’re for me.

DENNIS: You have more than one?

MAUDE: But of course. One for paper and card. One for plastics. One for glass. One for vegetable food waste.

DENNIS: What about one for bones and skin? Don’t you eat meat?

Maude looks at Dennis askew, still driving, and blanches.

CUT TO:

INT. MAUDE'S CAMPER VAN - AFTERNOON

Maude is still driving. Dennis is staring out of the window. Every so often he sniffs.

MAUDE: Please stop doing that.

DENNIS: Breathing?

MAUDE: Don’t be flippant.

DENNIS: There’s a funny smell. I can’t put my finger on it, but it's strong.

MAUDE: it’s Dettol. Though I’m surprised you can smell it with all that aftershave on.

DENNIS: Don’t you like it? I wore it for you.

MAUDE: I wish you hadn’t.

CUT TO:

INT. MAUDE'S CAMPER VAN - AFTERNOON

DENNIS: You look tired. Did you want me to drive?

MAUDE: You’re not driving my camper van.

DENNIS: Would you rather pull into a service station and intermingle with all the other people and their dirty ways?

MAUDE: Ok…but you’re wearing gloves first.

DENNIS: I’m not wearing…

CUT TO:

Dennis is sitting at the driving wheel of the camper van, wearing surgical gloves. It’s raining hard outside and the windscreen wipers are doing their best to keep up.The camper van suddenly starts juddering. 

MAUDE: What have you done now? What have you touched?

DENNIS: Why do you think it was me?

MAUDE: Well, it wasn’t happening whilst I was driving.

Dennis looks at the petrol gauge. Taps it. Taps it again.

DENNIS: We’re out of fucking petrol. You know that, don’t you?

MAUDE: No, I didn’t. And it won’t make it better by tapping it like that.

DENNIS: No. I do know that.

MAUDE: So why do it? It’s annoying…

DENNIS: Do you actually hear yourself? I mean, you are aware that we’re stuck out in the middle of nowhere.

The camper van cuts out and Dennis has the foresight to pull into a makeshift lay-by.

DENNIS: Well, that’s fucking brilliant!

MAUDE: Would you please stop swearing. I don’t know why you’re trying to make it sound as if it's my fault.

DENNIS: You are aware of the internal combustion engine? That it relies on petrol to function?

MAUDE: I thought it beeped at you.

DENNIS: I’ll fucking beep at you…

MAUDE: Stop swearing! Stop swearing! I want you to STOP SWEARING! (sighs) Look. You need to find a way to fix this.

Dennis states at Maude. He looks outside at the torrential rain and then at Maude.

DENNIS: I need to fix this? Why do I need to fix it? What’s in it for me?

MAUDE: What do you want?

DENNIS: What do you think I want?

MAUDE (pauses): No. That’s sacrilegious. I couldn’t abide you to touch me like that. I just couldn’t.

DENNIS  (sighs): If it was just that then I wouldn’t have put up with all this… It’s not just sex either. I do like you… I think… and I think you like me… kinda… I think. Anyway, we won’t go all the way; you have my word. 

Maude looks at him with disgust.

DENNIS: Look, let’s make this even simpler. I go. I walk out. Get a lift from someone. Leave you alone. In the dark. In the rain. ALONE. Understand? 

Maude looks at Dennis with contempt now.

DENNIS: Or I go walkabout with a petrol can. Find a petrol station. Walk back, in the rain and save your precious camper van. And you show me a little kindness for my troubles. What’s it to be?

Maude nods her head.

MAUDE: I don’t have a spare petrol can.

DENNIS: Of course you don’t. But apart from that, you agree?

Maude nods her head. Dennis smiles and undoes his seat belt. He opens the door and turns to Maude.

DENNIS: Keep the humming in your hummus, babe. I’ll be back before you know it.

CUT TO:

EXT. LAYBY - LATE AFTERNOON

Dennis jumps out of the camper van. He lands on the waterlogged, muddy ground and slips down a slope into a puddle.

CUT TO:

INT. CAMPER VAN - LATE AFTERNOON

Maude stares out of the windscreen.

MAUDE: Bloody idiot. 

Maude opens the glove compartment and takes out the safety hammer.

CUT TO:

EXT. CAMPER VAN IN LAY-BY - EARLY EVENING

Dennis trudges back with two full petrol cans. It’s dark outside now.  It’s still raining and he is thoroughly drenched. Dennis opens the petrol compartment and pours the contents into the camper van.

CUT TO:

INT. CAMPER VAN - EARLY EVENING

Maude is standing in the small kitchen, chopping vegetables with a sharp knife. She can hear Dennis swearing and making noise topping up the petrol. The door to the camper van opens and Dennis is about to step in.

MAUDE: What do you think you’re doing?!

DENNIS: What?

MAUDE: You’re not coming in here like that!

DENNIS: Jesus!! You’re kidding, right?

Maude just stares at him sternly.

DENNIS: What am I going to do then?

MAUDE: That’s up to you. You should have thought of that before you left.

DENNIS: I just walked four miles to the petrol station. I filled up two heavy cans. Paid for them and the petrol out of my own money, and thanks for that as well. AND I walked back four miles IN THE POURING RAIN!

MAUDE: I am grateful. That is why I have been cooking for you since you’ve been gone. And I would appreciate it if you did not shout.

DENNIS (sighs. Takes a deep breath): Look I don’t want to argue out here. I’m muddy enough. If you pass me a couple of those plastic sacks I can put the muddy clothes in them. Would that be acceptable?

MAUDE: Only if you leave your shoes outside.

DENNIS: Ok, they’re ruined anyway… They were my favourite shoes as well…

Maude is no longer listening. She throws three black plastic sacks at Dennis. Dennis strips sheepishly in front of Maud. Maud does not look, she is intent on chopping the vegetables. The meal is to be a selection of homemade vegetables and dips. Dennis looks at them and turns his nose up. Dennis has boxer shorts on and is now choosing something to wear. 

DENNIS: It’s cold out there. I thought we were going to have something hot.

MAUDE: I’m not going to stink the place out with cooking, thank you.

Dennis is holding up different shirts to his body and looking at himself in the mirror. He does this a few times.

MAUDE: Just pick one goddammit!

DENNIS: You can’t rush these things, my dear.

At the word ‘dear’ there is a visible tic in Maude’s eye. It starts slow but starts to grow. The sounds of her chopping become more pronounced now.

CUT TO:

During the meal they sit in silence. Maude tries not to look at Dennis. When she finally does she can see him stare at her. The flutter in her eye increases.

CUT TO:

Later the meal is over. Dennis tries washing and drying up. Maude sits on the couch in the corner and seethes. Maude gets up, rips the dishcloth out of Dennis’s hands and starts everything from scratch.

CUT TO:

INT. CAMPER VAN - NIGHT

Outside it is still raining. The camper van rocks through the gusts of wind.

DENNIS: I’m so glad I got the petrol when I did, eh? 

MAUDE (Sarcastically): Yes, yes… You’re very clever. I don’t know what I would have done without you… Make the damn move, won’t you?! Why don’t you make the move? Why do you think I’m just sitting here?

Dennis sits bolt upright.

DENNIS: Hang on now, darling. Don’t be like that. You can’t rush things.

MAUDE: Don’t call me darling. And I thought it was the only thing you were any good at…

DENNIS: I beg your pardon?

MAUDE: You have a reputation. I wanted to take advantage of that reputation. I wanted to see what it was like… sex, I mean. I thought it was the only thing you were good at.

DENNIS: You’re kidding me… I hate to break it to you, Maude. It’s just that, a reputation. It’s amazing how little sleight of hand it takes to create a reputation. That’s why I really wanted to be with you; I thought you were different.

Maude is taken aback by this. She looks at Dennis and sees vulnerability. She relaxes a bit.

MAUDE: I’m sorry. I’m on edge and shouldn’t have taken it out on you. I think it would mean more if you… take me like this. Please.

Maude motions to Dennis. Dennis gets up and walks over. He sits down nervously next to Maud. Maude stiffens up immediately. Dennis puts his hand tentatively on Maude's leg and she slaps him.

DENNIS: What the hell?

MAUDE: I’m sorry! You took me off guard; I’ve never done this kind of thing before.

Dennis leans in closer only for Maude to lean back. Dennis pushes closer and tries to kiss Maude. Maude slaps him much harder now Dennis slips off the plastic covers onto the floor.

DENNIS: What the?!

MAUDE: I’m sorry! Really…. I do want this, but you just need to be patient with me.

DENNIS: Patient?

MAUDE: Would it help if we just got undressed and went straight into it?

DENNIS: Yeah; right – I need to be a bit more aroused before that, you know?

MAUDE: What can I do about that?

DENNIS: Seriously??

MAUDE (with disgust): You want me to touch it!

DENNIS: What else you going to do? Suck it?

Maud dry retches. Dennis sighs

DENNIS: Let’s try it again… just try not to hit me this time.

Dennis places his hand on her thigh, leans in and kisses her. Maude starts to tremble. She places her hand on his shoulder. Dennis kisses Maude deeper. Maude bites down and then slaps him.

DENNIS: FUCK! Right! That’s it! I can’t do this shit any more. You’re crazy – just crazy!

Dennis pushes himself off the seat and sits away from her.

MAUDE: I can’t help it!

DENNIS: (mimics her) I can’t help it..  (in his own voice) Well, I’m not going to try again… I’m going for a dump.

Dennis gets up and walks towards the toilet.

MAUDE: I don’t think so… you’re not going in here. This is my camper van. You can sleep here, in the front, but you are not.. I repeat, you are not going to the toilet here.

Dennis is about to shout at Maude. Maude’s face is contorted now, her eye is fluctuating and her upper lip is starting to judder at the corner.  Dennis puts on his sodden clothes again and picks up a roll of toilet paper.

DENNIS: This isn’t over.

CUT TO:

INT. CAMPER VAN - NIGHT

Maude is cleaning the camper van. She is happy. There are no facial tics. She has taken all the cutlery out of the drawer and is cleaning every bit before putting them back into the drawer again. The door slams open and a very muddy, very dishevelled, drenched and thoroughly pissed off Dennis staggers into the van. He is covered in mud and shit.

MAUDE (She starts looking disgusted, then bemused): What the hell happened to you?

(She now looks flabbergasted.)

DENNIS: Hell is right… all because of you and your pristine toilet. You wouldn’t believe what I’ve gone through.. The weather’s so much worse. I found a place that I thought was safe to take a crap. But I didn’t count on the river bursting its banks… and it happened when I was mid-shit as well. I’ve no idea how far I was carried before I managed to grasp onto one of the trees that were overhanging. It’s taken me this long to get back..

MAUDE: I hadn’t even realise how long you’ve been gone. Shut the door will you…

DENNIS: That’s charming…

MAUDE: Just what do you think you look like?

Maude laughs. Laughs hard. She is laughing so hard that she has to steady herself on the kitchen sink unit. Dennis stands there for a minute. The door is still open and water is starting to seep in from outside. The river has burst its banks. Maude is still laughing. Dennis lumbers up to her, his muddied shoes squelching on the sodden lino.

Dennis slaps Maude across the cheek. She falls on the kitchen top to the floor, dragging the cutlery drawer with her. Dennis looks at her on the floor and realises what he’s done. He bends down to help Maude back up. Maude grabs an apple corer blindly and stabs him with it. She screams as he jerks back. As he backs away he slips in the water that's flowing through the open driver's door. 

Dennis falls back hard. Maude scrabbles up and leaps at Dennis. She pins his legs and stabs him with the corer tool repeatedly. She has a pristine smile on her face as the muddied waters rise around her.

FADE OUT:

TITLE CARD: DENNIS AND MAUDE WENT CAMPING

A Touch Of Mink - an original screenplay

EXT. AGRICULTURAL COLLEGE - EARLY MORNING

Five individuals break into the agricultural college. Close to dawn. They are organised; with keys to the various rooms. Three men (NORMAN, TOM and NEIL) and two women (KELLY and SUE) all dressed in dark clothes. Their faces are covered up.  SUE and Tom split off into another building which is set aside from the main building. The other three run quietly into the breeding pens. Kelly and Norman carry bolt cutters. 

INT. BREEDING PENS. EARLY MORNING

They enter the building. There is a lot of noise coming from further inside.

NORMAN (Whispering harshly): What a fucking stench!

KELLY: Shut the fuck up. Keep talking to a minimum! We want to be out as soon as possible!

They can see eight cages in front, all full of mink. The mink are hissing and writhing, aware of the intruders. Their backs hunched.

NEIL: Why are they so quiet? Surely they should be squealing?

SUE: They all had their vocal cords cut; it’s more peaceful that way.

Sue walks to one of the cages, urges the other Norman to take the other pair of bolt cutters. They open seven of the cages. After opening each cage they step back and allow the mink to run out into the wild. As they attempt to open the last they hear a scream and shouts of horror coming from the other team. 

The remaining mink leaps at the metal of the cage, stunning the two men. One of them bites Sue's hand. The other mink escapes, making it hard for the men to help Sue. The two men struggle.  The mink finally releases its jaws and runs off. There are still shouts coming from the other building and the two men run off. Sue looks at the opened cages and then at her hand.

CUT TO:

INT. LABORATORY - EARLY MORNING

A makeshift laboratory in a renovated farm-building. A large cage; the type of desks found in a college laboratory. There are bags of feed; tubs of chemicals.

The two men run inside and see the mangled body of Kelly. Her throat has been torn out and there are bloodied furrows ripped into her body. The opened cage is covered in blood and Tom is cowering in the corner, staring at bloody footprints.  The bottom of the door has been torn to pieces. 

In the distance the sun can be seen to start rising.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:

TITLE CARD: A TOUCH OF MINK

The song: Good Morning Freedom by Blue Mink starts playing.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:

EXT. CAMPSITE - NIGHT

A family of three share a Lichfield Challenger tent. Mum and dad in their own sleeping bag, the young child in its own, reading a “Scream” horror comic. A small WH Smith Radio Cassette CR208 can be seen and is playing the final bars of “Good Morning Freedom”. There is a Coleman light next to the radio. (All of which should scream ‘1980’s’.)

RADIO ANNOUNCER: And that was Good Morning Freedom sung by Peters & Lee. Next up…

The radio is turned off by the mother.

MOTHER: We’ve got a big day tomorrow, dearest. Off to sleep!

CHILD: Night, night mummy. Night, night, daddy.

Both the parents say goodnight and the mother turns the light out. Silence. Complete silence. Rustling sounds are heard. Then chittering and hissing are faint but rapidly get louder. A mixture of squealing and squeaking is then heard, closer. The child wakes up the mum and dad as shapes press on the canvas of the tent. They hear screams coming from outside. The tent is RIPPED OPEN and their screams join the others.

CUT TO:

EXT. CAMPSITE - MORNING

Parts of the campsite are a complete mess. Tents torn to bloody shreds whilst others are untouched, empty. There are lots of police. Lots of the police tape and a line of demarcation around the entire area. By-standers and local journalists jostle against the tape.

Two of them are WOOD and BYRNE. Wood is stern, thin, but looks vulnerable with sandy, wispy hair; badly coiffed. He wears small, round John Lennon style granny-specs. Byrne is a larger fellow with short, dark frizzy hair. He’s keen, sharp and disarmingly humorous. 

They are talking to one of the locals, an old man, by the cordon.

WOOD: Did you know anyone in the campsite?

LOCAL: I’d seen one of them last night. They had a lovely daughter. Crying shame!

BYRNE: What happened, do you think?

LOCAL: Not a clue. Haven’t seen anything like this for a…

The local stops himself. A police officer notices the two reporters and motions to them.

POLICEMAN : We don’t want you stirring things up round here. I know you’re just doing your job but now is not the time to do it. There will be an official statement later on. For now, just leave us time to process everything.

Byrne has been watching over the policeman's shoulder. He can see a couple of tents in the distance that haven’t been touched.

BYRNE: So why do you think this maniac chose those particular families to attack? Was this a series of random killings or was there a more arcane motive behind it?

POLICEMAN: That was no fucking maniac. That was an anim…

2ND POLICEMAN (SHOUTS): That’s enough, constable!

1ST POLICEMAN: You’ll have to wait for the official statement. Now clear off, the pair of you otherwise I’ll have you done for obstructing a Police Officer.

The two journalists look at each other, shrug their shoulders and walk off down the hill.

CUT TO:

INT. BYRNE’s CAR - MORNING

Byrne is driving, Wood looks at his notes.

BYRNE: I still don’t know how you get away with it!

WOOD: Pure charm, my friend.

BYRNE: Right from the school of Columbo, no doubt.

WOOD (Mimic’s Peter Falk): Now, there’s just one more thing… They do think it’s an animal related attack.

BYRNE: Rats?

WOOD: Could be. We must be due for another James Herbert book soon… but I don’t think it’s likely.

BYRNE: What do you think that old man was going to say? I thought it sounded like it had happened before.

WOOD: Hang on a minute. You might have something there. It should be in the research notes I made before we came out.

BYRNE: Swot!

WOOD: Four eyed twat!

They both laugh as Wood rummages through the notes in his small knapsack.

WOOD: Here we go. Edith Foyle. She doesn’t live that far away, near Amberley. She complained a while ago of her sheep being attacked.

BYRNE: Amberley here we come!

CUT TO:

INT. COTTAGE KITCHEN - MID MORNING

Edith Foyle’s cottage is remote, on a hill just outside the Amberley Chalk Pits. There is no neighbour within a mile or so. Wood and Byrne sit with Edith, drinking in her kitchen. A few empty wine bottles sit on the work top.

EDITH: It was never the same. No one believed us, even when they saw the sheep. We were accused of making it all up. Burt couldn’t take it, drove him to an early grave: heart attack.

WOOD: I’m sorry to hear that, Mrs Foyle. What did you say killed your sheep at the time?

EDITH (almost whispering): Mink.

BYRNE (caught off guard): MINK?

Edith nods once

BYRNE: Attacked your sheep?

Edith nods again.

WOOD (sees the wine bottles): Why don’t you tell us what happened?

EDITH: They were in the pasture. The field just beyond, over there.

(Points north)

EDITH: And it was late one evening. We could hear the sheep bleating in panic. We thought a fox was worrying them, trying to kill the lambs. Burt got dressed and went out with the shotgun. All I could hear were the sheep and Burt yelling! When I finally sees what’s happening I can’t believe it. Their fur was like bloodied silver. They ran for it after Burt tries shooting at them but they were too quick.We were lucky, they only killed four of the flock but it were never the same after that. No one believed us, and neither do you.

WOOD: We want to believe you, truly we do Mrs Foyle but we need proof.

BYRNE: If it ever happens again; and I hope to god it doesn’t; then you need to take a recording of it. Have you got a cassette recorder you can use? If not, we have a spare portable you can borrow. Here’s my telephone number. Please use it day or night should anything happen.

EDITH: Yes… I understand. Thank you for coming…

CUT TO:

EXT. NEXT TO BYRNE'S CAR - MORNING

Wood and Byrne shrug their shoulders and look back to the cottage

WOOD: It was worth a try.

BYRNE: Foiled again.

CUT TO:

INT. BYRNE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT

The telephone rings. BYRNE fumbles for the light. It’s on the small bedside chest of drawers next to the bed. He finds it and turns it on. He then finds the telephone and drags himself into a position where he can answer it. It is a chunky ‘80’s phone

BYRNE: (rubs his eyes whilst answering) H… hello? Who is this?

There is an almighty ruckus from the other line. Lots of squealing; clawing and scratching sounds. Very loud. 

EDITH (Whispering but bordering on hysterical): You’ve got to come and get me, Mr Byrne. They’ve come back; all those months and they’re breaking into the cottage again. It won’t be long now. You’ve got to come and get me. Save me, please. You can hear them, can’t you? They’re right outside. It won’t be long at all. I’ve recorded them, just as your partner asked, Mr Byrne. I just hope it’s of…

Sounds of wood smashing. Loud squealing now, mixed with the screams of Mrs Foyle. The line goes dead.

CUT TO:

EXT. MRS FOYLE’S FARM - EARLY MORNING

Wood and Byrne arrive at the farm. The bottom of the farmhouse door is chewed to bits. They walk inside. Mrs Foyle has been torn to shreds, blood everywhere. She has only been partially eaten. They’re both almost sick and have to put handkerchiefs over their noses and mouths. Wood looks around cautiously. Byrne finds the cassette recorder in the sink. The tape is still inside it. Just then they hear a police siren in the distance.

WOOD (Whispering urgently): Is it there? 

BYRNE: Yeah. What’s that fucking stench? I thought she drank wine not fucking horses urine!

WOOD: Who cares what it smells of! Hide the tape; we might need it!

BYRNE: Where?

WOOD: Down your pants, they’re big enough.

Byrne ejects the tape from the recorder and shoves it down his jeans and into his y-fronts.

BYRNE: I’ll shove it up your arse if you’re not careful.

Byrne and Wood listen out for the siren but it’s more distant now.

BYRNE: I think we better get the flock out of here.

WOOD: That’s a little tasteless don’t you think?

BYRNE: Do you really want to stop and talk about morality and wait for the police, or shall we drive away from the scene of the crime?

Wood nods and they carefully make their way out of the cottage and to the car. It’s starting to get light. Wood is about to get into the car when he glimpses into the distance. There is slight movement by the border fence. 

WOOD (points): What the fuck is that?

BYRNE (Looking in the same direction): Where?

WOOD: Fuck sake - there… Wait, it’s gone now. It was the size of a dog!

BYRNE: t was probably Lassie, then! Look, I really do not want to have to explain to the police what we are doing here amongst a slaughter-fucking-house! Can we go now?

Wood nods and they drive off.

CUT TO:

INT. WOOD’S HOUSE - MORNING

Wood and Byrne sit in the kitchen with a cup of tea. They’re both in shock. 

BYRNE: I killed her. Me and my damn mouth. If I hadn’t asked her to record them then she might still be alive.

WOOD: Don’t be fucking daft. Neither of us believed her. She didn’t have to stay there. But we now owe it to her to find out what the fuck is going on. 

BYRNE: Pound to a penny that those poor fucking campers suffered a similar fate; and the yokel knew something.

Wood finds a cassette player. Byrne throws him the tape. Wood looks at it and grimaces before putting it in the machine.

WOOD: So did the police too; they’re covering something up… Just how far back do these attacks go!

Wood presses Rewind and then Play. The sound is a piercing shriek; deep and powerful.

BYRNE (almost falls from his chair): What the fuck was that? Give me warning next time your voice breaks, for fuck sake!

WOOD: (Rewinds the tape to the start) Sorry!

High pitched and frantic squeals are heard, then Mrs Foyle’s frightened sobs and breathing as she dials the rotary telephone. 

MRS FOYLE: You’ve got to come and get me, Mr Byrne. They’ve come back; all those months and they’re breaking into the cottage again. It won’t be long now. You’ve got to come and get me. Save me, please. You can hear them, can’t you? They’re right outside. It won’t be long at all. I’ve recorded them, just as your partner asked, Mr Byrne. I just hope it’s of…

Byrne and Wood stare at the cassette player. Her screams are heard amongst the squeals and banging, thrashing noises. There is the sound of the cassette player being thrown and rebounding in the sink. Mrs Foyle’s screams suddenly die down and all that can be heard is the squeals of the animals. 

Then there is the frightening sound from earlier. The other squeals sound more frantic and then they suddenly get quieter before silence

BYRNE: I say again… what the fuck was that?

CUT TO:

INT. LIBRARY - AFTERNOON

Wood is sequestered in the local library, at the microfiche reader, scrolling through old local news headlines. He finds an article from 1974 about a break-in and theft from an agricultural college but few actual details. 

WOOD (to himself): Break in or break out? 

He scrolls further until he reaches another article. This is about a break-in of a mink farm in Surrey by The Animal Liberation Front who released all the mink.

WOOD (muttering to himself): What if something went wrong during the College theft? What if they wanted to hush things up?

CUT TO:

EXT. ARUNDEL WETLANDS - AFTERNOON

Byrne is with a conservationist, CLIVE, walking around Arundel Wildfowl Trust.  They’ve both got waders on. Clive has got a backpack on.

CLIVE: …Protection… Look… I wouldn’t normally be interested in talking to the press, but I’ve also had run-ins with mink recently. They’ve been on the increase ever since those bastards at the Animal Liberation Front raided that mink farm. Hypocritical sods! Free one species but fuck all the others they come in contact with… and you can quote me on that!

Byrne does his best not to show alarm at this news. He’s made the same connection as Wood did and now is anxious to learn more.

BYRNE: I think we’re going to get along famously, Clive! I’ve got a recording that I want you to hear. It’s going to be distressing but it’s vital if you can identify the species.

Byrne plays the tape, with the volume low. Clive’s mouth drops and his eyes open wide in shock and horror. He’s deeply disturbed by the last thing he hears.

CLIVE: Mink… I’ve no doubt… I’d know that anywhere! But never that frantic before!

BYRNE: But what was that last roar?

There’s another series of squeals and shrieks.

CLIVE: You can turn that thing off now, thanks. I’ve heard enough!

BYRNE: (Looking at the tape machine) But it’s off… I turned it off!

CUT TO:

EXT. THE STREET - AFTERNOON

Wood knocks on the door of a terrace house. A man answers.

WOOD : Norman Glick? I’m sorry; I don’t have much time but I need you to tell me what happened on the night of the 15th June 1974 and why you were only prosecuted for burglary for a totally unrelated situation.

CUT TO:

INT. NORMAN GLICK’S KITCHEN - AFTERNOON

Wood and Norman are in the kitchen. Norman is close to tears as he finishes recounting what happened that night. 

NORMAN: How were we to know what was there? We were told to free the mink. So we freed the fucking mink! We’d been tipped off by someone who worked in the college. Someone who knew part of what was happening there and was disgusted by the rumours.

WOOD: Did you get his name at all?

NORMAN: I found out later that his name was… Robert, something… (shakes his head suddenly) But that… thing… I never even saw it, just saw what it did to Sue.

WOOD: Only three of you were prosecuted though. There were five of you. Even if Sue sadly died, there was still the other woman… (Checks his notes) Kelly Thrower. What happened to her?

NORMAN: She… she died before the trial.

WOOD: She died? How?

NORMAN: She was bitten during the escape.

CUT TO:

EXT. ARUNDEL WETLANDS - AFTERNOON

Clive and Byrne now hear screams as they run forwards. Clive takes his backpack off and hands Byrne a can of pepper-spray. He holds another. Clive also has a hand-held air-horn.

In front they see a bird hide covered in writhing, translucent, gun-metal grey shapes. So many of them. The screams are coming from within. They both stop, unsure of what to do. Clive rummages around in his backpack and digs out a smoke bomb.

CLIVE: It pays to be prepared! I did my own research, just in case.

BYRNE: Glad you did!

Clive throws the smoke grenade at the shelter. It explodes; the bang and smoke frighten off the majority of the mink and they disperse in all directions. Four of them run towards the two men, fast. Two of them leap up at them but Byrne is ready with the pepper spray and frightens them off. A third leaps up and sinks its teeth into Byrne’s hand. Clive uses the air-horn on it. It releases its hold on Byrnr’s hand and runs away. The last one hunches its back and hisses at them before running away too. Clive looks at Byrne’s bleeding hand. 

CUT TO:

INT. NORMAN'S HOUSE - AFTERNOON

Norman is still telling Wood about the events following the break-in.

NORMAN: It all happened so quickly. It was deadly. Within a week she had organ failure; just wasted away. We thought it was rabies, a super-strain developed by the damn college but the Doctors swore blind it wasn’t. It was nothing they’d ever seen before.

WOOD: You ever find out what it was?

NORMAN: Yeah. I did my own research. I needed some kind of closure. It’s called Aleutian Disease, it was a parvovirus, whatever the fuck that is. Extreme weight loss, blood vessel inflammation and organ failure… and there is no known cure. All it took was one lousy bite.

FADE OUT:

INT. HOSPITAL WARD - EVENING

Wood rushes into the ward, after being told not to run in the corridors. He sees Byrne sitting up in bed, looking sheepish.

BYRNE: I really owe Mrs Foyle a huge apology. We were attacked by mink. MINK! They were swarming over a bird hide and if it wasn’t for Clive’s quick thinking. Clive was the Conservation chap… All of us would have been chopped meat! Sorry, I’m still high on the adrenaline. I can’t believe we survived!

Wood doesn’t respond. He can’t look Byrne in the eye. He just looks at Byrne’s wound, where he was bitten. 

BYRNE: What? Who died now? What is it? 

Wood tells Byrne what transpired with Norman, and what happened to the woman who got bitten in the mink farm raid. Up until now this has purely been in gesture and muted voices that are barely audible; then:

BYRNE: FUCK! Dirty little FUCKERS!

Everyone in the ward looks at him with dismay but Byrne is beyond caring.

BYRNE: How long have I got?

WOOD: I don’t know. Weeks, maybe?

BYRNE: We need to finish it. I don’t know how, but I don’t give a damn about the story any more. No one else should die because of this.

A man walks in; an overcoat covering most of his face. He pulls up a chair and sits next to Wood, facing Byrne. This is Robert.

ROBERT: I think I can help. 

CUT TO:

INT. PUB. EVENING

Rob is talking to Byrne and Wood. Byrne is drinking heavily, a couple of empty shot glasses next to his pint.

ROBERT: I know I should have told someone before now. I did try but it was always hushed up by the college with my reputation and job at stake.

BYRNE (slightly slurred): People were fucking dying!

ROBERT: I only recently found out. All the other incidents were hushed up. They said they were conducting their own investigations. But I wonder now whether they really bothered. If anyone found out what they’d been up to; the lengths they’d gone to alter the fur yield, the college would have faced legal action!

WOOD: Fucking hell. Is that all; and all the people that lost their lives? What about them?

BYRNE: But why now? Why us?

ROBERT: Because of what you said in the hospital… and I think I know how to get rid of them once and for all. I’ve got a plan.

CUT TO:

EXT. MRS FOYLE'S COTTAGE - NIGHT

The kitchen sits directly above the cellar. A reinforced door leads downstairs.Outside, another entrance leads directly into the cellar.

Montage of Robert, Byrne and Wood putting together a huge cage in the cellar. The police tape is still around and there is still the outline of her body in the kitchen. The rest of the cottage has been cleaned. 

The cellar door leading outside has been reinforced, apart from a makeshift tunnel. This leads to a reinforced cage. Inside the cage are frog carcases and crayfish; mice and rat guts.Bait for the mink.

The three men sit in the kitchen. Wood and Robert try not to look at the chalk outline. Byrne toasts it with the bottle of whiskey he’s holding.

Robert has bought a camping gas stove and three canisters of gas. The smell of gas is pungent. Suddenly the sound scrabbling at the outside of the cottage can be heard. They all look at each other anxiously.

BYRNE: You sure they can’t get in here? You’ve reinforced the kitchen door? Not that I care for myself, mind.

The cellar door tunnel gives out and they hear the mink squeal. They then hear the thrashing of the mink against the cage itself.

BYRNE: Got the fuckers! You sure they can’t escape?

ROBERT: I learnt the hard way what those things can escape from. Those bars are double the strength of the last lot, at least.

The sounds intensify and become extreme. There is a crashing sound from the cellar door and screeches from the mink. The thrashing sound against the cage becomes more frantic and a nightmare growl and the piercing, powerful shriek Byrne and Wood heard before.

The three of them dash to the joining door to the cellar and open it, switching on the light. It’s a charnel house; a writhing, bloody mess. The mink are being eviscerated by something impossibly large. The size of an Alsatian but sleeker; teeth tearing indiscriminately into its smaller brethren.

ROBERT (horrified): No! Fuck, please no. It can’t be! I thought it was a myth, something they made up!

The giant mink turns to the new sounds and sees the three men. It lets out another shriek and throws itself at the bars. The three of them run out into the kitchen, slamming and locking the door behind them.

BYRNE: Locking the door’s a great idea. We’re lucky it doesn’t have pockets to hide the key! 

WOOD: (Gripping Robert by the collar) What is it? What the fuck is it?

ROBERT: They wanted to create the perfect mink; gorgeous fur, denser and faster growing…

WOOD: How?

ROBERT: They studied nutritional science in order to accelerate its growth.

They hear the sounds of the cage being smashed.

BYRNE: What’s its favourite colour? Who the fuck cares! I say again: What are we going to fucking do?

Byrne looks around and sees the camping stove and canisters.

BYRNE: We cook the fucker! (points to the camping stove) Turn the gas on and light the fucking fire. The explosion should wipe the fucker out.

WOOD: And the cottage too! 

There is a thump on the door. The giant mink is throwing itself at the door in frustration and frenzy. It can then be heard chewing through the cellar door extremely quickly.

WOOD: It’s not going to hold much longer. I’ll go out and secure the cellar door outside. Stop them from escaping!

BYRNE: I’ll stop the fucker from escaping. Give me one of the bottles. I’ll hide in the larder. I’ve got my trusty fire lighters here. As soon as it gnaws through the door BANG! Toasted Mink.

Wood looks at Byrne. Wood understands what Byrne is going to do. Byrne nods and grins an evil grin.

ROBERT: I’ll put the other two canisters at different points to maximise the explosion.

Wood turns to Byrne.

WOOD: Four eyed twat.

BYRNE: Swot.

Byrne walks into the larder with the gas canister and turns it on as Wood walks out the door. 

Robert turns the valve on one and places it just away from the front door. He then runs back to the cellar door, releasing the valve on the other as he does so. He places it on the ground. The cellar door explodes outwards. The giant mink launches itself at Robert's prone body, knocking him over. It tears his throat apart. Byrne opens the door, sees the bloody mess.

BYRNE: Fuck!

Byrne slams the door as the giant mink leaps at it. It tears chunks out of the door as Byrne stares transfixed in the far corner. He grips the two ferro rods tightly. The gas seeps out from the canister. The mink charges through the splintered door. Byrne smashes the ferro rods together.

BYRNE:  I ain’t afraid of no….

Huge explosion. Flames surge into the sky, consuming the cottage. There is no sign of Wood.

CUT TO:

EXT. THE COTTAGE - NIGHT 

The fire is raging over the remains of the cottage. The blackness of the night is in sharp contrast to the purifying flames. 

“Our World” by Blue Mink fades in as the credits roll.