Stan
is afraid of the dark and its past his bedtime but he’s been told that he’ll be
safe –he’ll be looked after. He has someone to watch over him. The wood is dark
and he shivers in the cold, the dressing gown and jim-jams doing nothing
against the cutting wind, the slippers already soaked and mud caked but still
he walks to the magic place just as he was told to. He tries not to feel the
brambles snarl his hair, rake his flesh and he chokes back the tears. He
mustn’t cry, this is his secret: he’s been blessed as one of the chosen and
this is his night. The owls herald his approach, he can see the clearing at the
bottom of the daffodil dell and there his friends are waiting for him to join
them. He walks towards them and lets the night envelope him. No one can hurt
him anymore.
Jeez… Another nightmare…Who
was it who said that if you haven’t settled in to your new house during the
first week you probably won’t do at all? Esme asked herself. She knew that it
didn’t bode well. It should have been perfect: the dream home in the country miles
away from anywhere, the ultimate seclusion: paradise. So what was wrong with
it? It was miles away from anywhere, slap bang in the middle of the country in
a secluded nook in Sussex where no one knew your name but everyone knew your
business.
Staplewood was ideal for
Tristan, her husband, less than half an hour’s drive from the nearest commuter
town of Haywards Heath but it gave him somewhere quiet to return to after the
busy, turbulent days he spent in the office.
She still didn’t know
exactly what he did for a living –something to do with selling, or overseeing
property abroad… every time he told her she just glazed over, so after a while
he stopped trying. She was interested (almost) but he wasn’t the greatest of
raconteurs and had the habit of explaining the minutiae of the job rather than
the job itself. ‘But the job is in the details’ he would reply, to which she’d
just nod.
It sounded trite and
stereotypical to say that it was his decision to move here rather than hers;
his needs over-riding hers. He needed the peace and quiet and wanted so
desperately to be the country mouse, but having already lived in the country
and hating it as a child this was the last place that Esme wanted to be;
especially going back to the very village… not to mention house that she’d
escaped from all those years ago. The trouble with stereotypes, as every writer
knows in their heart of hearts, is that they’re, more often than not, true.
Esme had inherited the
familial home when her mum passed away and she just wanted to sell it, forget
about the past and put the money to better use.
Tristan was in the midst of
one of his existential mid-winter crises and was feeling cramped and suffocated
in the town; he wanted away from the hustle and bickering, the drunkenness and
vandalism. He knew that living in the country would solve all his problems and
it didn’t matter how many times Esme tried to tell him the realities behind his
sad fantasies he wouldn’t listen. He never did.
Two children, which he was
very rarely at home for, were a living testament to this. Two desperate
attempts to increase the love that he wanted to feel for her and for the ‘honeymoon
period’ after each child was born he couldn’t do enough for them both. He was
there in every way possible, giving support and love wherever it was needed,
but when the paternity leave ran out so did he –right back to work.
So the latest ‘chance at
happiness’ was moving into the country and he had suggested it the same way he
had suggested having children – the same way a child would: incessantly, with
pouting and the silent treatment when not getting his own way. Esme no longer
had the wherewithal to refuse him, he had managed to wear her down. She had even
tried leaving him but he had ceaselessly hounded her, begging to be forgiven,
pledging anything to be allowed to make it right, promising everything that it
would never happen again. And, just like a child, after the initial week of
contrition he went back to his old ways… worse, he then sulked for a while
afterwards.
Staplewood itself was a
small village; just a handful of houses, a restaurant (with delusions of
grandeur) and a Norman church. There was an overbearing wood nearby, and two
ponds in the immediate vicinity where her father had fished but the bulk of the
village itself was a single street which was almost an afterthought to the main
Steaplecross road and tapered off to a single dirt track which led to Hardings.
She had been indifferent to
the village when she was growing up, aware that everyone in her year at school
knew the comforts of living in the towns of Haywards Heath and Cuckfield. They
had a social life and were in constant contact with each other; she was the
social pariah, outcast because of a situation out of her control. Such was
life.
By contrast, her brother
Stan had loved Staplewood and saw himself as Alan Quartermain searching through
the woods trying to find the lost city full of treasure, but he was the one
lost to the wood. He often played there on his own; mum and dad so part of
country life they could see nothing at fault –no harm could come to him. Things
like that happened to other people,
didn’t they?
He was missing just short of
a few days when someone found him, his little body swaying in the morning mist;
almost peacefully but for the pain etched on to his once ecstatic face. One of
Esme’s skipping ropes (which had been used both as a mountaineering rope and a
lion-tamers whip up until that time) was tied around his neck but he had died
of suffocation rather than by a broken neck. From the clumsy knots used and the
choice of the skipping rope the police listed the case as death through
misadventure rather than investigate as a suicide, or possibly something far
worse. Those were the days, after all; things like that never happened and what was worse no one seemed to question
it.
The bereavement was like a
tidal wave sweeping the old life away leaving only desolation and guilt. The
marriage didn’t last and her father left and tried desperately to live a new
life; start afresh. He had been blamed for not looking after Stan by Esme’s mum
–after all, it was easier laying the blame on someone else rather than take it
on yourself and he died a few years later. Esme’s mother stayed, wanting to
stay close to her boy, not prepared to accept that he was never coming back.
Esme could only take so much and moved as soon as she got the chance, only
visiting when it could no longer be avoided.
She tried feeling guilty
over abandoning her mum but after her father left she became the focus point of
the blame: she should have been keeping a closer eye on him rather than
cavorting with her friends. (What friends, she would shout back.) But the truth
was no one had doted on Stan as much as Esme had; no one loved him more. To her
mum and dad he was just the latest pawn in their mind games, and now the same
thing was happening in her own family.
So moving to Staplewood had
been a mistake and Tristan was adamant that they were going to make the most
out of the opportunity, despite Esme explaining the history of the house and
what had happened to her mum and dad. Tristan was impervious to her pain.
However much Esme loathed to
be back there was no way she was going to let it impact on her kids. Luckily
Tristan earned more than enough money to allow her the luxury of not having to work, which meant she
could enjoy the time with Jacklyn and Beth. Jacklyn was old enough to go to the
local primary school at Wardinghurst but Beth wasn’t old enough yet; the two of
them could go exploring the local area doing the things that Esme had enjoyed.
She knew that Jacklyn had
always found it hard to settle in mainly due to the other kids picking on his
name. Tristan had wanted a girl as a first born and had had his heart set on
the name and refused to change it, despite her protestations. Jacklyn often tried his best to shorten the
name when introduced but his father would have none of it. Tristan’s will be
done regardless of who else it hurt, so there was a constant resentment between
father and son with Esme slap in the middle. In one way it had brought her
closer to Jacklyn as he seemed to appreciate what she was going through, having
to deal with someone as obtuse and obstinate as Tristan.
The village hadn’t changed
at all; it still had the ‘old world charm’ complete with shuttered windows and
closed minds. Her mother had been ‘a villager’ and trusted but Esme knew that
she never would be; she had raised too many questions about Stan’s
disappearance and death that no one wanted to answer. It was easy to silence a
child, especially when the parents were complicit but when she came of age the
village made it very clear what would happen to her if she tried sticking her
nose in where it wasn’t wanted.
She had been on her way home
from the pub (which was now a shamelessly over-priced restaurant), just a
hundred yards door to door; it was a close night and she wore a light summer
dress and a leather jacket her boyfriend, Steve, had given her the week
previously. It looked good on her, everyone loved it (except her mother) and
she was happy with how things were going in the relationship. It wouldn’t be
long now, she thought to herself, and quivered with anticipation. She didn’t
heard them come up behind her. It wasn’t that they were particularly stealthy
but her guard was completely down. There were three of them, two men and one
woman.
Her arms were suddenly
pinned by one of the men, the woman clamped her hand roughly over Esme’s mouth
and did most of the talking. “If you know what’s good for you then you’ll shut
up.” They didn’t try to hide their identities; what was the point? She couldn’t
see the third person but she knew he was there in the darkness. “Don’t ask
questions, don’t rock the boat.” The woman hissed. “Keep your mouth shut.”
The third man now stood in
front and pressed up against her, running his hands around her in a way he
hadn’t done before, his smile predatory, nasty. “She knows… don’t you, babe?”
“Don’t call me that. Don’t
ever call me that again.” Esme bit back against the hand, causing the woman to
flinch before slapping her.
“Does that mean we’ve broken
up?” Steve mocked.
“Keep quiet about this; and
stop trying to dig up the shit. No one wants to know.” The other man had said
before kneeing her in the back, sending her sprawling into the road. The three
walked back to the pub leaving her sobbing and alone.
When Esme finally managed to
get back home her mum was sitting in the lounge, opposite the door, in
darkness. She didn’t say anything but her eyes were full of recriminations, the
message was obvious –Esme was alone. No one else cared.
Even though that had
happened eight years ago the village hadn’t forgotten. She was still greeted by
hostile silences when she walked along the street, even her kids were shunned
(another reason why Jacklyn was picked on by the other kids, perhaps?). They
were one of the few families to have the luxury of two cars and Esme knew
enough not to park her car in the street; parking was bad enough in such a
small village and it was only right that Tristan parked his in the drive. They
had a garage but it was so full of boxes from the move that it was decided Esme
would park in the churchyard for the time being.
Then came the vandalism;
subtle at first: broken wing-mirrors, muddied graffiti, scraped paintwork –all
of which Tristan put down to kids. The church car park was right on the main
road and easily accessible, he said –anyone could have done it, he said...but
Esme knew differently. Ultimately it was the red paint that made it untenable.
“We’re still watching” said one; “stay quiet” another. Tristan never asked what
it was about but moved the boxes from the garage instead, for once making no
comment.
Things changed for the
better on a walk around Centenary field behind the churchyard. She’d had a tree
planted in her brother’s name when the field had been planted with saplings for
the new millennium and had been meaning to visit it for ages. She took Beth and
Jacklyn on a walk and tried to persuade Tristan to come but he was too busy
watching football on TV. Neither of the kids seemed too interested in her
family history and were more intent on playing amongst the maturing beech
trees. She didn’t mind too much, she was just pleased to have found it after so
many years away.
It was doing well and hadn’t
been overshadowed by any of the other trees in the clump. She knelt by its base
and sent her love to Stan, hoping that he could feel it.
“I’m sure your brother would
be proud to see the tree, just as I’m sure he can feel your love even now.” The
voice was deep but gentle and she couldn’t place it at all. She looked up and
saw a lofty man standing to one side of her, just on the rim of the tree clump.
Upon standing she realised that he was a priest.
“Thank you, father…?”
“Jim. Father Jim.” He
replied. Tall and thin with strawed yellow hair, he was of a singular
appearance, the clerical collar seemed too loose for comfort and his rounded
glasses too thick to see clearly, but his face was kind, understanding. “I
suppose I should have said Father James, which would be more in the biblical
vein but… well, Jim is more familiar. In fact, just dispense with the Father
bit completely. Just call me Jim.”
“Jim it is, then.” Esme
could feel herself warming to Father James, which made a complete contrast to
the last few vicars who had served the village. “How did you know I was
thinking of my brother? Or that I even had a brother?”
“Elementary my dear, Esme.
May I call you Esme? Thank you. Well, although I’m fairly new here myself I
haven’t seen you here before –the village is small enough that it doesn’t take
long to memories names and faces. I
deduced that you must have had a family connection to the village (or had lived
here yourself) otherwise you wouldn’t have chosen a specific tree to kneel
before. And I saw the name on the label there; Stan Woodward –he was one of the
children that was… lost, if you pardon the expression.”
“Yes; lost in more ways than
one. I’ve got to say you’ve done your homework…. Does that mean you know
about…”
“I know how the other
villagers have shunned you, yes. I can’t say that I understand why… it doesn’t
make sense to me at all. You want to know the truth behind the deaths –is that
why you’ve come back?” Jim asked.
“No. To be fair I didn’t
want to come back, Father… sorry… Jim.” Esme blushed.
“Either or any combination.
I’ll answer to anything these days!” he smiled. “Why have you come back, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“My husband’s idea, would
you believe? When mum died he saw it as an opportunity to escape his little rat
race… I’m sorry, that sounds terrible.”
“Not at all. I’m sorry for
your loss, by the way. Does your husband know about the history of the
village?” Jim asked and Esme nodded. “And about your brother? And he still
wanted to come here.”
“I can see that I’m going to
have be guarded around you, Jim. I’ve only known you five minutes and already
telling you far too much. It must be your priestly robes.”
Jim laughed good naturedly.
“Would you call yourself a Christian then?”
“If I’m brutally honest, no.
I’m sorry – I know how that must sound.”
“Ha. I do understand and I
don’t hold it against you. To be honest.. and I’m speaking confidentially,
mind..” He put the side of his hand to his mouth as if conferring a secret at
this. “I can’t say I blame you.”
“Father Jim.” Esme said in
mock seriousness and laughed when he put his hand to his mouth in shame.
“The church doesn’t exactly
make it easy anymore; it hasn’t always grown with the times. In fact, I was
faced with a bit of a dilemma –I could either become a shrink or a priest.”
“Or a bar tender?” Esme
replied, drawing a laugh of delight from Jim.
“If only I thought of that!
I’ve missed my calling; it’s just a shame I don’t drink…”
“You don’t need to partake
of the product to become a barman…. Is that why you became a priest?”
“I do have faith… and I
wanted to help people. I trained as a psychiatrist but it felt wrong charging
people just to exacerbate their problems. I mean, seriously… when did therapy
really help anyone? Surely the whole point of therapy is just prolong the
treatment and keep them coming back for more?”
“So what’s the difference
from becoming a priest?” Esme was enjoying this chat too much, it had been too
long since her last adult conversation (somehow the moans and chiding from
Tristan didn’t really count). She was still aware where Jacklyn and Beth were,
however; they’d just found the stone mushrooms and so she started to walk
towards them. Jim followed her.
“Touché.” He replied. “And,
again, I can only agree with you. However I felt that by becoming a priest I
could potentially help more people.”
“Then you’re to be
commended.”
“Thank you.” He nodded. They
had reached the stone mushrooms where the kids were sitting. “Hey, kids!”
“Say hi to Father Jim.” Esme
said to them both. She turned to Jim and added, “There’s still got to be some
respect, don’t you agree?” She winked.
“Oh, absolutely!”
That evening she couldn’t
help but think about that chat. Tristan, as usual, had fallen asleep that
afternoon despite the ‘big game’ and was now catching up with the edited
highlights in bed. The kids had warmed to Jim just as quickly as she had, it
was difficult not to. He was quite an enigma and Esme could easily see him as a
lifestyle coach or guru –maybe she’d suggest such a thing next time they met…
There’d been something niggling during that whole afternoon which she’d only
just remembered: Jim had mentioned noticing a name label on the tree but there
hadn’t been one on there in years!
Later that night… she knew
that Beth had gone missing. She woke up, a sheen of cold sweat covering her
body but it was the knowledge that Beth was missing that chilled her more.
Tristan was unresponsive to her shaking him, oblivious to the pain she was
suffering –she had lost her brother to this.. this plague of suicides, she
wasn’t going to lose her daughter as well. She grabbed her parka and quickly
pulled on her wellington boots not caring whether she made any noise; she
didn’t even bother to shut the door, she just rushed out to the wood.
It was bitch cold; the wind
lashing at her, goading her. It was not going to happen again, not her
daughter. The ground was sodden, muddy as hell but she paid no attention to it,
going as quickly as she could along the path to the entrance of the wood. She
was oblivious to everything else; the only thing that mattered to her was
getting her daughter back alive. She found herself pausing at the mouth of the
wood, the holly maw almost mocking her –was it the inevitability that stopped
her for that second? She wouldn’t be denied though and headed straight for the
daffodil dell –the same place where they had found her brother, all those years
ago.
The body hung limply like a
discarded doll with its back to her, the night abruptly silent, mournful. Esme
ran to the limp form barely able to see for the panic stricken tears stinging
her eyes; just one thought echoing constantly in her brain: “No.. No.. No..!”
She scrabbled at the form, tearing at the coat, turning it round. She screamed.
The sudden hand on her
shoulder made her slip as she turned and she fell at Tristan’s feet. “What the
fuck is going on? I’ve been calling you for ages!”
“Stan…my baby brother –he’s
there!” She turned back only there was nothing there, no body hanging at all.
“Beth!! What happened to Beth? Where is she?” She suddenly panicked, that was
why she had left so abruptly.
“Beth is at home, in bed.
Tucked up asleep. What the hell are you up to? Why didn’t you hear me?” Tristan
snapped. “Do you know what time it is? What’s going on?”
“I’m sorry –I thought Beth
was missing… I thought she…” She said, unsure whether she had been dreaming or
sleep walking. Tristan didn’t seem to care.
“I’ve got an early start,
for Christ’s sake.” He turned his back on her and walked back to the house
leaving Esme to sob into the chilled night. In her hand she held the glove that
her brother had worn the night he had gone missing. What the hell was happening
to her?
Father Jim was no stranger
to nightmares. It was the same reoccurring dream: leading a group of five children
across the icy pond. All the children were tied together; their arms roped in a
mock gesture of prayer; their legs tied so they could only shuffle along single
file. He was in front, his arms and legs free but tied by the waist to them.
The snow covered ice was hard going, made harder by the children’s scuffling
gait. Without warning the ice cracked; hairline at first but quickly giving
way; the children never had a chance, barely able to scream as they
disappeared. Jim knew he would be next just as he knew that it was all his
doing, just as if he had tied the ropes himself.
He wasn’t surprised to see
Esme sitting in the church, waiting for him later –her children sitting with
her quietly. It had barely gone ten.
“I need to talk to you,
Father.”
“Is this a confession?” he
replied, trying to sound more upbeat than he felt.
“Sometimes I think it’s far
too late for that.” Esme then retold the events of the previous evening, even
explaining about the glove. “The thing is, there’s no one I can turn to.
Tristan just doesn’t want to know. He’s always been insensitive but this is
something else entirely. I think someone in the village has already spoken to
him; he barely seems to tolerate me now. You probably think I’m mad.”
“Then we’re both mad because
I find myself believing you…. One of my biggest fears is that madness is
hereditary.”
“What do you mean, Father?”
“I don’t know whether I
should tell you this. I’m almost afraid of what you’ll think of me.”
“It can’t be any worse than
what’s happened already.” She looked at Father Jim’s pained face. “Can it?”
“I have ties to this village
as well. Did you know that?”
“No. I didn’t.”
“My father was Tony Bane…
Father Tony Bane.” He saw the colour drain from Esme’s face.
“I can see why you’d want to
keep all that a secret. Christ, if the village found out!”
“The sins of the past work
by association, unfortunately.”
“Did you know?” Esme asked,
her voice now no more than a whisper, not wanting her kids to overhear.
“That my father was a
paedophile? That the first suicides that happened here were because of him?
Well, I didn’t know at the time but even I knew that things were… wrong in our
household. All of a sudden no one talked about him, as if he never existed.
Things went bad to worse, as you can imagine and I only found out the truth
when I grew up. That was the main deciding factor why I became a priest and
ended up here, I wanted to atone for his sins.”
“Did they ever find the body
of Juliet?”
“No… that was the only thing
that stopped them from lynching him…”
“And then he killed himself…
bastard.” She looked up, suddenly realising what she’d said. “Sorry. I can’t
imagine how you’ve had to deal with this.”
“It’s not been easy, but he
was a sick man… and I’m nothing like him.”
“A sick? You can’t seriously
believe that? Or is that the shrink in you?”
“I’m not excusing what he
did on the grounds of mental incapacity, far from it. I meant he was sick to do
what he did –it’s something that I could never countenance doing. He knew what
he was doing and, both as a man and
as a priest he should have known better. My only release is that he’s suffering
in hell not only what he did to those poor children but because he took his own
life.”
“Hell’s a big thing for you
Catholics, eh?” Esme said snidely, her world rocked by Jim’s revelation.
“Please. I don’t want to
fight.”
“So why did you tell me? You
must have known that it would affect me!”
Jim looked heavenward as if
trying to draw strength. “Why did I tell you? Good question.” He turned back to
Esme and looked her in the eyes. “I wanted you to know that you could trust me.
I know what you want to do and you’re not the only one who needs absolution.”
“Big words again, Father.”
“Don’t try to hide from your
truth. For whatever reason, Esme, you’ve been brought back to get to the truth.
Staplewood has a disease that’s destroying the children. Your family fell
victim to it and I’m trying to atone in my own way. Together we may be able to
get there, but the whole village is going to be against us. You were given a
sign last night….and I think I was as well.” He sighed and recounted his dream
to Esme. “I think one of the children on the pond was your brother; I think
they’re trying to tell me something too.”
“What do you want me to do?”
Esme asked, earnestly.
“It’s always bothered me
that Juliet’s body was never found.” Father Jim replied. “The moment a body is
found then it becomes a murder investigation…”
“.. I don’t see how that
would make any difference… it didn’t with my brother!”
“No… but those were
different circumstances. Your brother’s death was put down to death by
misadventure –did that never strike you as strange? An investigation would have brought up a whole
different kind of investigation; more searching questions. A missing child in the
countryside is one thing; another suicide in a closed community –as Staplewood
was back then? Well, that’s a whole different story; the police probably would
have uncovered something closer to the truth.”
“You don’t mean?” Esme was
shocked. “They were complicit in it?”
“Not in the way that you
think…. But did they allow the molestations to happen in their own way? No one
wanted to face the reality –that it was a man of the cloth made it so much
worse. The fact that my grandfather killed himself actually did them a favour.”
“But that’s sick! I can’t
believe they’d sink that low.”
“Don’t you? Are you really
so surprised? You’ve already told me how your parents reacted to you. Your
brother was the first child to go missing since Father Bruce killed himself;
and when he was found hanging it was proof of the wrong that had been done.”
“Surely my brother was
murdered? I’ve never truly believed that he killed himself.”
“I hate to be the one to say
this but it does look as if he took his own life. The autopsy was very
thorough, probably at the villager’s insistence.”
“How do you mean?” Esme
asked, confused at the turn of events.
“In some ways a murder would
have given them the chance to blame an outsider… Do you remember the body of
the tramp who was found at roughly the same time?”
“Oh my God… yes, I do. I
know I was only a kid at the time but the news was rife around the school as
one of the kids found him in the shallows of the Furnace pond. You’re not
saying that…”
“Yes.” Jim interrupted. “I’m
saying just that. I don’t know who did it but if it’s as I suspect; it would
have been far easier to pin the murder on the tramp, especially if the tramp
had died of ‘natural causes’.”
“But that’s disgusting. I
knew the village was screwed up but I never thought they were that fucked up.”
She blanched suddenly at the turn of phrase. “Sorry. Force of habit.”
“I understand completely.
But now you know what we’re dealing with and I want… I have to get to the
bottom of it all.”
“What do you want me to do?”
“Are you sure? This could be
dangerous – what I’m going to propose is pretty radical for a priest.”
“You want to find Juliet’s
remains, don’t you?”
For the second time in the
week Esme found herself in the wood after dark. Father Jim was with her this
time and they were near the spot where Esme had been led during her nightmare.
This time she had been
careful to sleep in the spare bed– which was happening with more regularity,
she had noted. Ever since they had moved to Staplewood they had made love once
and once only –the first night. Ever since then he had hardly touched her and
the arguments had started over nothing in particular. Often the arguments led
to her sleeping alone in the spare bed, and for the first time she was grateful
for this; it was easier for her to sneak off to the wood.
Jim was already waiting for
her at the mouth of the wood, holding the canvas bag they were going to use to
transport the remains back to the churchyard. “Are you sure you want to go
through with this? You won’t be able to go back from this if we find
something.”
“We are going to find her,
Jim; I can feel it.”
“So do I. Right… I’ll be
guided by you.”
The blind night made it
easier for Esme to orientate herself; for some reason she could tell where she
had to go by the feeling in the pit of her stomach. It didn’t take them long to
reach the daffodil dell; she half expected to see the body hanging from the
tree again and could still see it in her mind’s eye.
“That’s it!” She whispered.
“That’s why I was shown the vision. She’s buried by the tree there.” She
pointed to the base of the tree and the two of them got on their hands and
knees. The loamy dirt was cold and wet as it soaked through their jeans; they’d
bought hand trowels as they had no idea how deep the body lay; they didn’t want
to disturb the body more than necessary. It didn’t matter how long it took or
how uncomfortable they were; neither of them spoke for the hour that they moved
the earth away; carefully scraping the dirt rather than digging –more like an
archaeological dig than an exhumation.
“I think I’ve found her.”
Esme hissed. Jim came round to where she knelt and used his hands to verify
what she had uncovered. It was indeed a human skull.
“You’ve found her alright…
and a whole heap of trouble.” The sudden voice was punctuated by the stab of a
torch beam followed by others.
“You just couldn’t leave it
alone, could you?” She recognised Tristan’s voice amongst the group.
“She never could, mate –
regardless of how many warnings we gave her.” The blast from her past; it could
only have been Steve, her previous boyfriend.
“Bastards. We’re only trying
to lay this to rest.” She snapped back, cradling the skull in her hands now.
“If you knew where she was
why didn’t you give her the burial she deserved?” Father Jim replied,
incredulous at what was happening.
“You’ll be the one buried if
you’re not careful.” One of the mob snapped.
“What are we going to do
with them now?” Tristan asked.
“Nothing’s changed… we stick
to our plans, but things have been made easier now.” Steve replied. “We’ve got
the one final victim and now we’ve got the prime suspect who killed himself as
a final act of contrition.”
“What? What do you mean? You’re
going to kill him? Kill the Father?” Tristan was shocked, this was going much
farther than he had ever imagined.
“You’ve got no say in this.
You don’t know his family –it’s because of his father that we’re in this
situation in the first place. It’s only right he pays the price for it.”
“You don’t want to go
through this, Tristan. You’re contemplating murder.” Father Jim pleaded, his
hands tied behind his back as he lie on the sodden mound from the earth they’d
dug up whilst searching for Juliet. Tristan had almost finished making up the
noose that would be his undoing. “You can’t do this. Think of what it will
mean.”
“Shut up.” Tristan snapped
back. “You don’t understand.” Tristan pulled Father Jim up by the scruff of his
neck, seemingly ignoring his attempts to shake free.
“Nor do you, Tristan. You’re
not even from the village, you’ve got no stake in this at all. You can back out
and leave and no one would be any the wiser.”
“Shut up. I have to do
this.” He put the noose over Jim’s head and tightened it.
“What about your wife? What
about Esme?”
“We’ll both be damned then.”
It took three sharp pulls on the rope to hoist Father Jim aloft and there was
nothing he could do to prevent it. It would have been a perfect end if not for
damning Esme in the process. His last thought was of pain and regret.
Esme was not going down
without a fight; they had to drag her back to the churchyard; her hands cuffed
behind her back but she made damn sure that at least two of her captors would
never be having children again.
“Why are you doing this?
What the fuck do you think you’re going to accomplish by killing me and Father
Jim?”
“You’ve never listened to
us; never left it alone like the rest of us.”
“None of you had your
brother taken from you; none of you know what it’s like!” Esme snarled back.
They were reaching the churchyard where she had been christened all those years
ago. How apt that here was where she was going to die.
“All of us have suffered
here. You’re not the only one. That bastard took all our children away from
us.”
“How fucking dare you? How
can you say it’s the same thing? My Stan killed himself. You damned yourself by
ignoring what Father Bane did. How many of you knew and did nothing? How
many?!” Silence. Damning silence. “It must have been torture; the longer it
went on the more of you suffered knowing that by rocking the boat for one you
rocked it for the rest… Damning you for the ineffectual parents you are; so
much for community spirit. So now you’re going to end it by killing me and Father
Jim? Do you really think it will end there?”
It was neither heaven nor
hell that greeted Jim Bane; he felt disembodied; numb. The blackness was
comforting but disconcerting at the same time. Where was he? What was
happening?
“You must help her. This must
end..” It was impossible to quantify what it was; had he been incarnate then he
could easily have said that he ‘heard a voice’ but he was both the voice and
the receiver. It was part of him as he was part of it. More than that, he knew
what it meant.
“How can I? What can I do to
end it? They’ve gone too far this time…”
“Have a faith… help her and
we will help you.” The presence replied.
“With all my heart.” Then
nothing. A deafening absence of any sensation. The silence receded into pain;
the pain increasing as sensation flooded him and he found himself lying on the
woodland floor, his throat lacerated and bruised where the rope had….
He opened his eyes; Tristan
knelt over him, wringing his hands. “Thank Christ.” He whispered.
“Wha… what happened?” It hurt
Father Jim to talk but he knew that he had to. There was still much to be done.
There was still Esme to be saved and the wrong righted.
“I couldn’t do it… Lord help
me, I just couldn’t do it. I don’t know what came over me, I’d never do
anything to hurt Esme but….” The tears streaming down Tristan’s face were real,
something had made him cut Jim down but now wasn’t the time for rationalising.
They could still make it.
“What are you fucking
waiting for? You’ve got the gun!” Esme wanted this nightmare to end. There was
nothing she could do to get out but there was no way she was giving up; she was
damned if she would make this easy for them. She was surrounding by the men in
the graveyard, Steve just stared at her. It was obvious that they wanted her to
just lie down and give up but there was no way she was going to do that, not
whilst there was a breath in her body. “Call yourself men? None of you got the
balls to just shoot me.” She spat, thrashing out as much as she could to anyone
who got close enough.
“You should never have come
back. You should’ve left alone when you had the chance.” Steve replied, holding
the gun so it was level to her head; his face emotionless just as it had been
that night when he confronted her with the group. This was it, she thought.
This is how it ends, her brother unavenged and Father Jim framed for it.
“This ends now!” The voice
seemed to echo around the graveyard. Everyone was startled by the shout. “You
have no idea what you’re doing.” It was then that they saw Father Jim approach
them from the entrance of the church, the porch light suddenly triggered by his
presence giving him an unearthly glow. Tristan was behind him holding the
canvas bag.
“Oh, I think we know exactly
what we’re doing, Father.” Steve replied coldly; his face devoid of emotion. He
turned to Tristan and said, “I knew you weren’t one of us.”
“Think about what you’re
doing, what you’re all doing. You’re going to kill, murder in cold blood two
people.” Father Jim implored.
“It’s not too late. This can’t
go on any longer.” Tristan agreed, realising now just how he had been caught up
in the maniacal fervour.
“You don’t know what’s
happened to us; what it’s done to us.” One of the villagers shouted back.
“You have no idea what it’s
like to lose someone.” Another agreed. “You’ve no idea how this has eaten us up
from the inside.”
“But I do!” Esme cried out. “And
yet I’m the one that you’re punishing the most.”
“You won’t let us forget
what happened. You keep trying to dig up the past…”
“My brother died because of
it. Why can’t you understand that?”
“You think that by killing me
and Esme it’ll stop you from feeling the guilt over what happened to your
children?” Father Jim edged ever closer to the crowd, closer to Steve and the
gun. “So what happens when you realise that you’ve killed two innocent people…
and the guilt over them becomes too much to bare? Whose turn will it be to die
then? Don’t you understand? When is this going to stop?” He motioned to Tristan
to come forward with the canvas bag.
No one tried to stop him;
they knew what it contained and all were shamed. Tristan opened the bag and
nestled within were the skeletal remains of Juliet. Steve saw the bones, finally
faced with the truth behind his fears. He dropped the gun and fell to the
ground before her, sobbing.
“She was the only girl who
ever showed me kindness in school.” He wept. “We were in love the only way kids
can be…and I said… I said that I’d
always look after her.”
“Now you can.” Father Jim
walked up and placed his hand on Steve’s shoulder in reconciliation. “We can
bury her and her soul will be finally at rest.”
“But what about the village?”
Tristan asked.
“The village will carry on..
it has to, but it can heal now. We should never forget what has happened but we
must move on and rebuild. We all need to watch over each other now. Who knows,
maybe someone has been watching over us all along.”
